Top Definition
A variation on the blumpkin wherein a man performs oral sex on a woman while she is sitting on a toilet taking a shit.
"Why does Roger seem so down today?"
"Well, I guess last night Sheryl asked him to give her a Paul Blart."
"Dude, that's disgusting... did he actually do it?"
"Yeah, he really does love her... I guess afterwards he threw up in the sink. He says he can't get the smell out of his mind... it's haunting him."
by Simplicius April 14, 2009
Derogatory term referring to mall security staff, and on a larger scale, any security guard that doesn't have the authority to issue arrests or carry firearms (see rent-a-cop).
"Hey Paul Blart! I just pissed in the wishing well! What are you gonna do about it?"
"There's a couple Paul Blarts in the food court telling those kids to calm down, but the kids are telling them to fuck off."
by BfloDrumDude June 20, 2012
A bloody-fart (blood+fart=blart) that happens when you do a line of cocaine. Also known as "mall copping"
This blow is good, I just about Paul Blarted myself.
by negro jesus christos February 22, 2010
The act of being a fatass working as security in a small mall in New England and being murder from dank faze clan
My brother was Paul blarting then he died
by BlueGrass420 May 14, 2015

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