1. Do not mispronounce our state name. It's "Ahia" or "Ohiuh" or "Ahio" or "Uh-hi-uh" or some variation of the forementioned (or sometimes, in the southeast, just plain "'hia"). It is NOT "Oh-high-oh". Just... no. This is the easiest way to tell if someone's from out of state.
2. Ohio is not all flat. If you think this is true then you've obviously avoided the entire eastern part of the state which is quite hilly, especially the southeastern part, being the edge of Appalachia.
3. We are better than Michigan in everything we do. Period. We have been brought up knowing and understanding this law (every Ohioan knows the song "I Don't Give a Damn For the Whole State of Michigan!" by age five); if you have the stupidity to yell, "I LOVE MICHIGAN!" in public then you will be mauled (except for maybe in Toledo, which might as well be in Michigan).
4. There are three different distinctive Ohio accents. These are:
a. The Southeast accent: From Wilmington to Cambridge and below (basically south of I70 and east of I71)(especially prevalent along the West Virginia border). Commonly mistaken for a Southern accent. I once had a teacher from Chillicothe who would tell us to "'Collar' your pictures with crayons!"
b. The Middle accent: From Cincinnati to Bellefontaine, then east to Coshocton. The median between a southern and a northern accent, commonly referred to as the typical, ideal American English accent.
c. The Northern accent: From Lima to Dover and on up. Features the stereotypical midwestern twang (most northerners don't realize they have an accent, but they do).
5. We like our corn. Corn goes with everything. And we all know the saying, "Knee high by the fourth of July!"
6. We're the only ones allowed to insult our weather. Sure, we hate it, because it changes constantly. The only thing predictable about it is that it's sure to be UNpredictable! Winter weather in May and spring weather in January? Normal. However, if you come here and complain about this, we'll agree with you... then kick your ass. We're rather proud of our sucky weather. Come back with snow boots and a pair of shorts next time and suck it up like a man.
7. It's normal to sometimes receive change (primarily pennies) in the form of Canadian currency. Don't worry about it, you're still in America.
8. We think it's hilarious when you struggle to pronounce names like Tuscarawas, Wapakoneta, Cuyahoga, etc.
9. Yeah, we have a town called Hicksville. Get over it. Delaware is a city and a county, and Lima (pronounced LIE-ma) and Miami are in Ohio.
10. WE'RE STILL BETTER THAN MICHIGAN!!
2. Ever been to Jackson County?
3. It's all Michigan's fault. See the Michigan-Ohio War.
4. Clevelanders sure do have a hard time understanding what people from Gallia County are saying.
5. It's everywhere.
6. Yesterday it was 65 degrees and sunny. Today it's 30 degrees and slushing.
7. You're not in Canada yet.
8. "What is Coo-yuh-hoe-guh??"
9. And it's up north, bordering Indiana.
10. Go Bucks.
Most people believe, however, that Ohio DOES in fact exists, and that its mystery is due solely to the mysterious mists that seem to enshroud the entirety of the state in...well...mystery, deterring all but the most stalwart of travelers. Constituents to this belief also hold that Ohio is, in fact, the last home of the dinosaurs, and that Ohioan economy is based almost solely on quarrying and agricultural works using highly-trained dinosaurs as the primary (and literal) beasts of burden.
Someone from Pennsylvania: Actually, it does...it's just mysterious, you didn't even realize it was there. You know, what with all the enigmatically swirling mists and all...
Someone from Indiana: Really?!
Someone from West Virginia: Oh yeah, definately. A dinosaur from Ohio ate my sister, actually.
Someone from Kentucky: Oh, hey guys! What's going on?
The Other Four People: Oh...nothing...You know...
Someone from Kentucky: Cool! You want to hang out?
The Other Four People: *evasive mumbles*
Ohio DisLikes: that team from Up North (3rd Saturday of every November...) People who do not respond immediately with "I-O" when one screams: "O-H", Buzz Kills (which pretty much includes every citizen of Michigan)
Home to a bunch of formerly bad but now improving pro sports teams, a ton of colleges, the OSU Buckeyes, actual buckeyes, part of the Rust Belt, Cedar Point and a lot of soybeans, cows, and corn.
Ohio contains a little bit of all the typical Midwestern environments- college towns, suburbs, cities, urban areas trying to reinvent themseles, farmlands, etc. It also contains part of Appalachia, and a large number of "swing voters". It has quite a few ardent liberals and conservatives, and has been the home and/or birthplace of eight presidents. The weather, it being part of the Midwest region, is often "crazy" and swings between hot, mild, cold, and freezing. The four seasons are widely known to be "winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction" or something to that effect (believed to be taken from a Jeff Foxworthy chain email).
There's definitely a lot more there than bad drivers, "hicks", and cows, and just driving through the state does not really do it justice. You've got to experience it to really understand it, and then you can pass judgement.
2) A song written by Neil Young (while he was working with Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young) in response to the Kent State Massacre, which occured at Kent State University in Ohio on May 4, 1970 when National Guardsmen opened fire on student protesters on the KSU campus.
2) "This summer I hear the drumming,/ Four dead in Ohio."- Neil Young, (Crosby,Stills, Nash, and Young), "Ohio"
Me - "Oh, just a normal week in Ohio."