Anyone from upwards of Watford who hasn't got a bastard clue about anything but likes to shout the odds all day long, and thinks they're a 'bit of a character'.
Johnnie B, anyone from Coronation Street.
by Paolo Beardini December 05, 2003
anyone from the north, who works in the south, who has a life and doesn't spend their time moaning like a southern shandy drinker
Mike is a Northern Monkey
by A Northern Monkey July 01, 2003
A shovel-faced piltdown man with a hairy back and misappropriated smugness about his perceived genetic superiority when he's actually not able to hit the urinal with his first squirt, and speaks his mind in some bastardised distortion of the Queen's English. Hirsuit. Stoops and smells of pish.
Johnnie "Say what ah like and like what ah say" B
by paolo beardini December 09, 2003
A gentleman who talks about how much he likes gravy then proceeds to bathe in gravy and then drink it, keeps pigeons, ferrets and t'wife in shed in t'garden. Eats toast with oxo cubes sprinkled on top, comes to the pub with £1.40 and manages to get drunk and spill 4 pints of tetleys down his tweeds.
A northern monkey is identifiable in the pub as usually can be heard asking "can I have a light f'mi fag"
by Rich McLaughlin March 10, 2008
Any one in England ( Scottish must be Tartan Monkeys?) north of Birmingham who walks like they're the toughest creature on the planet
by Super.slinky October 22, 2003
A term that southeners call humans from the north of england due to the norths advanced evolutionary state.
Not to be associated with "Jocks"
by 8BallTitan September 21, 2003
Dodgey guys from above Watford whose dad's worked 'dun t'pit' and now probably sport a comb over and eat 'ovis bread, who have moved down south to get a proper job.

Not easily understood with their strange word phonetics, such as glac for glass, grac for grass, etc...

Think they're cool (obviously not), and are very surprised to find that people actually own stuff in da suff as it's not stolen on a weekly / daily basis.
Stew (with a C) is a typical Northern Monkey.
by Stew with a C July 27, 2006
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