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molasses mustache 

A mustache that's dripping wet With feces and seamen like a dirty Sanchez but without the pubes
After a long night at the rest stop bob had a molasses mustache from all the rides he'd been giving
molasses mustache by blumpkin25 February 8, 2015
- are you bagholding GME waiting for the MOASS?

- This is the way
MOASS by ChaosMcKinnon March 8, 2021

Sweet Sassy Molassy

Sweet sassy molassy get out the checkbook and pay grandma for the rub down!!

Modasser 

The cutest human being out there. He loves and cares for people out of the goodness of his heart. Really knows how to cheer people up. Makes really bad dad jokes but his looks make up for it. He always feels like home when you’re with him and knows how to comfort you when you feel lost. Best person to know out there. Modassers are one of a kind!!
Person 1: “Who is that cutie over there?”
Person 2: “That’s Modasser, duh.”
Modasser by pizzalover4501 May 4, 2020

molassochist 

Someone who derives pleasure from causing a process to move painfully slow.
The guy at the DMV is a molassochist!
molassochist by Mike Shryock December 29, 2007

molasses junction 

The painful situation that happens after a poor wiping of your ass; the dried feces then becomes thicker and it hurts when you try and wipe it.
Man, I was in a hurry after using the bathroom... now I'm stuck in Molasses Junction.