Masturbnine 

Like masturbating, but one better. Presumably illegal in most states.

John: Do you know where steve is?
Stan: I heard he was going to stay home and masturbnine
John: Oh no, I'll call the cleaner and start buying a new collection of socks.

Masturbnine by Menacing Sock Puppet April 28, 2010

masturbaited 

When you click on a porno and get a cooking show instead.

Me:Hey man I got masturbaited last night.
Freind: Really?
Me:Yeah all I got was a cooking show.

masturbaited by It's super soup March 27, 2015

Masturbinge 

Masturbating as much as you can in a short period of time

“Yeah, man. My period is starting soon so i gotta masturbinge before it starts”
“Mood”

Masturbinge by Area Rug June 10, 2018

Masturbinging 

Dedicating a whole day and or weekend to the act of masturbating.

George: "Aye Mike, you wanna chill this weekend?"
Mike: "Naw man, Im gonna have a nice masturbinging this weekend."
George: "Okay man, just dont forget to clean up your mess."

Masturbinging by Rooster Luck December 5, 2010

masturbike 

masturbike
(v): to stroke one's shaft until semen is ejaculated from the penis. While riding an effing bike. Seriously.

Happens sometimes at Colorado College...

Possibly the most perverted act one could ever commit.

"Did you see that sick pedophile masturbiking while he passed by all of those eight year old children? He just loves to masturbike; it's his favorite pastime."

masturbike by bassist9999999 September 3, 2009

masturbidextrous 

The ability to masturbate with both hands without incurring a decrease in efficiency.

*Loads up redtube*
Wait? I can eat a sandwich AND masturbate?! Great Scott. I didn't know I was masturbidextrous.

masturbidextrous by ChristianMcGonez July 22, 2011

masturbane 

A form of masturbation which can eventually lead to one's own destruction.

Petri went home yesterday and masturbaned for hours to Italian porn, then the mafia came over and bombed his house.

masturbane by Mrs. Hebert May 3, 2004