Something you pull on 10 guys wanting to jump you in the parking lot of a BP. Usually with an 18 inch blade and a thick hard plastic handle.
*Van pulls up and a gaggle of people jump out*
Jesse: Are you the fuckers I am supposed to whip the shit out of?
Me: HEY! Fuck you guys you are bringing 10 guys?!!? Well, this makes it even Jesse, Me, and this machete
*Van pulls away with quite a quickness*
Jesse: Are you the fuckers I am supposed to whip the shit out of?
Me: HEY! Fuck you guys you are bringing 10 guys?!!? Well, this makes it even Jesse, Me, and this machete
*Van pulls away with quite a quickness*
by P. Kaltenbach January 11, 2008
did you know jason has a machete
by RET September 22, 2004
After the act of either anal sex, vaginal sex, behind the knee sex, and/or being BLOWN, the man removes his penis and with a slashing motion, during the release of his baby yogurt, slaps the female continuously across the facial area. This creates a flowing stream of white goodness that showers the females face. The man also has the option of screaming "Machete" as he is bringing down the cum hammer.
Dude, I got pissed at your mom yesterday so I went ahead and gave her a Machete. She then had the biscuits to say that she wanted another. Dude, your mom loves the cock!
by Fat Cobra & Stunt Man Mike May 5, 2007
the alternate name for the male "unit" usually reffered by this name to impress the length of the machete to the ladies.
by Anonymous June 6, 2003
machete:an alternate word for the men with big wangs, usually used to cut the hyman in a virgins vigina by method of penetration.
by Anonymous June 6, 2003
by fr33ddie May 27, 2010
when a man is about to ejaculate, he pulls out of her anus and in a chopping motion slaps the girl in the face as he is ejaculating.
by fat cobra April 28, 2007