Don't mess with a Kristofer, and NEVER, EVER, EVER, mess with his girl. You will die.
Kristofer's girl: "Sorry, I'm taken."
Stupid teenage boy: "You sure? I mean, check me out."
Kristofer: "Stupid teenage boy... DIE!!!!!!!" *proceeds to kick him in the backside*
Friend: Wait, is he a Christopher with a C or a Kristofer with a K?
Hot Girl: Kristofer with a K, obviously. I would never date a Christopher with a C. God no. That's just disgusting.
Friend: You're so lucky. I wish I had a Kristofer with a K.
(Which promotes his sexual life.)
Goes best with chocolate and whipped cream.
Watch out for stray hairs.