A metrosexual with great taste for women.
Someone who people crave the feeling of his pork sword in their mouth.
A stubborn, family orientated individual who can manipulate to fit his own agenda with ease, and no remorse.
Someone who relishes in the darkness and finds great comfort in it.
Someone who people crave the feeling of his pork sword in their mouth.
A stubborn, family orientated individual who can manipulate to fit his own agenda with ease, and no remorse.
Someone who relishes in the darkness and finds great comfort in it.
Oh s***! We're dealing with a Jared.
My hero is a complete Jared, no doubt about it.
The only type of guys I'm interested in are Jared', the rest are a##holes.
*Sigh* Why can't there be more Jared'!
My hero is a complete Jared, no doubt about it.
The only type of guys I'm interested in are Jared', the rest are a##holes.
*Sigh* Why can't there be more Jared'!
by Dr J Edwards October 21, 2014
by shishtarshnapped October 9, 2018
by Towee March 2, 2007
Jared is laughter! He is like Noone, and definitely one of a kind! He's always looking for a good time, and never fails! He would use his very last of anything to help someone else succeed, or feel they matter. Jared is the most non judgemental person, he will leave you wanting more every time. Be careful, it's hard not to fall in love with Jared. He will understand all the mixed up parts of your soul, the darkest, lightest, and dustiest corners of your mind. He has those rock and roll eyes, and a heart of surprise.
by LTrain91 June 2, 2021
Once a lost and troubled soul trapped in the fourth underworld, Jared became a God to the Aztecs when mysterious life forms descended to Mictlan seeking an ancient rumored power. The citizens of Planet Z spent years traveling through different dimensions only to discover what they sought was not to be found - but created. Jared was chosen by the leader of Z. A few indulgent meanderings and shots of whiskey later, the celestial alignment cast an electric surge between Cancer and Scorpio. The surge was so poignant, tightly bound and focused that Jared became the first being to have successful intercourse with an extraterrestrial, bridging the gap between Gods and Aliens by taking on the role of Daddy: God of The Impossibly Mindblowing Orgasm. The Z leader surrendered to Jared as an object of pleasure for all eternity as an expression of gratitude for helping to create the ultimate sexual energy. Although Jared is immortal, his human form is a specimen of perfection, sexuality and divine masculinity. His generously proportioned reproductive organ was hand sculpted by Zeus with perfection in the style of a male Venus de Milo. Jared excels in all things delicious, and even his humanly procreative fluids are indicated by legend to have an intoxicating flavor as well as healing powers and a magical, iridescent glow.
I could spend forever drinking from a fountain filled by the excited expulsions of Jared.
Jared likes to get real fucked up.
Jared likes to get real fucked up.
by Ballfro Esquire May 8, 2020
When you first meet him he acts all tough but as you get to know him you realize how much of a softy he is. He is caring, understanding and he’s the cutest smile. It’s impossible not to fall in love with such a perfect guy.
Definition of perfect? Jared
by RedheadsAreAmazing May 12, 2019
Young, metrosexual man usually associated with sports such as Water Polo and Gymnastics. Has a perfect posture and excels at sport.
by pseudonym12312 July 28, 2012