Top Definition
Alliterative & hence popular slang term for a tiny fair penis, measuring around an inch erect or flaccid. Based on the small size of the Celtic Penis in particular, & of the British Penis in general: "Irish Inch. sl Lancia in Resta. The erect penis, US 1970s-80s. A slur on Irish penis size. (Green 1998, 642). 'I wanna find what they eat to make their tits grow so I can feed it to my wife.' 'They eat the Irish inch.'(H Gould, Fort Apache 1980, 33)." ('Lessico erotico inglese-italiano' subtitle: La Reggia dell'amore. Antonio D'Eugenio. Bari: Levante, 2002-4, v 1 of 2, p 181) The prevalent stereotype of the microphallic & foolish Celt is a play on the global under-endowed idiot or the Shakespearean 'Three-Inch Fool'.

According to widespread folk & urban legends, British microphallism is a result of a traditional eugenical practise of Norman kings & barons to forbid marriage to British males who measured larger than an 'Irish Inch'. It is said that the aim was to breed an obedient race of under endowed red-haired Celtic & flaxen-haired Anglo-Saxon serfs & that thus originated the 'Curse of the Irish Inch'. Hence the indigenous hatred of the 'Norman Yoke'.

However, this practise would only have exacerbated the evolutionary contraction of heat-losing external body parts (per Allen's Rule) already prevalent in the damp-cold climate of the British Uplands section of the British Insular biogeographic province in the Palaearctic Euro Siberian ecoregion.
1) '"Ok," said Dean, licking his lips like a predator going in for the kill, "so, you had it off with a girl you've never met before, by being a member of a group of letter writers that doesn't exist, at a school you've never been to & managed to drive your Irish inch for hours?"'
"Er." said Seamus ... "Yeah."' ('Pieces of a Hogwarts Pie' Mharvey 09-19-02

2) "The Farrellys' endless fascination for novel varieties of human types makes for some lively sight gags ... dick-joke cutaways between Long Dong Silver & 'Irish inch' stereotypes." ('One from the Shart: Hall Pass' Nick Pinkerton. Houston Press 24 Feb - 2 Mar 2011, p.27)

3) "Showing the penis stereotype of the huge black man and the Irish inch---check" 'Hall Pass ---a Movie Review' Martin D. Goodkin, Feb 25, 2011

4) "Yes, in Tokyo, I paraded my giant schlong in the public bath to intimidate the Japanese men with their small endowments. In Dublin, I hauled out my humongous dick at every urinal so those afflicted with the 'Irish inch' could get a good jealous peek." Jeremy, "a man around forty", The Divine Sister {Drama} Scene 5, p.35, Samuel French, 7/4/10,

5) Seamus: I talked me wifey into sucking me Irish Inch by tellin' her it'd help her lose weight!

6) Mae: Me hubby calls his dick his 'Irish Inch' & blames its small size on his Irish descent - he claims it is common - lol. (BabyCenter, 1 Mar 2011)
by Moollah_Do_Pyaza November 13, 2011

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