I Loosened It For You 

What a guy says, with no hint of sarcasm, after he tries to open a jar of Mayo and fails, and his 95 lb. twig-shaped aneorexic girlfriend opens it after him.

Guy 1: Hey man, can you open this jar of Mayo?

Guy 2: Sure

<grabs jar out of hand of Guy 1 and strains considerably at opening it. He fails and hands it to his 95 lb. twig-shaped aneorexic girlfriend, who pops that shit open like it aint no thang.>

Guy 2: I loosened it for you...
<As Guy 1 laughs>

I Loosened It For You by G-Negro December 15, 2008

I loosened it for you 

What people say when a task they were trying to accomplish was accomplished by someone else due to the first person's actions.

Literal:
Guy #1 tried to open jar but can't
Guy #2 takes jar and opens it easily
Guy #1 says "I loosened it for you..."

Not literal:
Girl #1: "What do you call something that's out of date and now irrelevant?"
Girl #2: " Oh! Oh! Oh! I know this... It starts with an O!"
Girl #3: "......OBSOLETE!"
Girl #2: "...I loosened it for you!"

I loosened it for you by GRAMMAR-POLICE October 16, 2010