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1.
(Hot Female Induced Retardation)

This phenomenon occurs when the brain ceases to function to its full potential in the company of a beautiful woman, often resulting in accidents, injuries, odd behavior and extreme embarrassment. In more extreme cases, it can result in police arrest or death.
1/ Man sees a gorgeous woman and in an attempt to catch her attention, he waves and walks into a tree. HoFIRe.

2/ Friend 1: "Oh my god I saw the hottest chick the other day while I was out driving! She was so gorgeous I couldn't take my eyes off her"
Friend 2: "Oh yeah, did you stop and ask her out?"
Friend 1: "Uh, no... I had a HoFIRe attack and I accidentally ran over a small child"

3/ Doctor: "What happened to your hand?"
Patient: "HoFIRe. I was in the kitchen making a smoothie for my girlfriend and she flashed me"
Doctor: "Oh, well... what's left of your hand needs to be amputated"
by Wyldside27 April 26, 2011