Functional Retard 

A person who is obviously weird, strange, and does retard-like things, but is a fully functional human being, or whatever species they are. Usually they are assholes, but they're usually enjoyable and funny.

Example 1)

*Gonzo screams "Dick Waterfall" in the middle of an instructional period*

Jessica: What is wrong with that man

Amber: I don't know, but he must be a pretty functional kind of retard.

Example 2)

*Actual disabled child walks by*

Jessica: He's probably not a very functional retard

Amber: Dude, that's my brother.

Functional Retard by ThatFuckWad December 4, 2014

Functional Retard 

fuhngk-shuh-nl ri-tahrd

1. Psychology. a person of the operational order in a former classification of mental retardation, having a mental age of less than three years old and an intelligence quotient under 25 yet still mantains the ability to convince society of their relevance, and ability to be trusted to act intelligently.

2. A charismatic individual which demonstrates inconsistent reasoning abilities and has an inherent disreguard towards their sociological perspective.

3. One who assumes "any publicity is good publicity."

Dixie: Can you believe that idiot?!? Does he have any idea how offensivly stupid he is?!?

Dewey: I can believe it because he is a Functional Retard.

Functional Retard by Mr. Nova<3 April 3, 2011

functionally-retarded

Adjective describing a person(s) who has just enough brain cells to survive; devoid of common sense and mental aptitude.

Dave is such a tool. I bet he can't even wipe his own ass. He's functionally-retarded.

People suck. Most of the general public is functionally-retarded.

functionally-retarded by Brett319 June 17, 2008

functionally retarded 

Mental deficiency characterized by stumbling speech, disconnection with reality, and unrestrained ego, yet behavior which is accepted by at most 50% of the population.

George W. Bush is functionally retarded.

functionally retarded by John Manyjars June 20, 2008

cornholio 

Ruler of Lake Titicaca. Rumored to have a bunghole that gets very angry if it does not receive toilet paper. Cornholio the Great is often seen walking around with his shirt over his head and his hands in the air, chanting songs about his power, and his bunghole.

"I am Cornholio! You do not want to face the wrath of my bunghole, for I need TP!"
Butthead: Shut up, Beavis! (uh huh huh huh)
Beavis: Um, okay. (heh heh heh heh).

cornholio by AYB July 20, 2003