A portmanteau of ejaculates and calculates. Used to refer to a situation where a man calculates precisely when he will ejaculate in order to take a definitive action e.g . pulling out.
1) Tom ejalculates so he can avoid cumming inside girls, as he doesn't like to wear condoms.

2) "Last night, I had to ejalculate 'cause Sadie wanted me to finish on her tits.
by guywhowritethething August 5, 2016
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A word created (most likely by teenagers new to the scene) by missppelling the word "ejaculates".
As a new word it needs a new definition, as such this word will now mean:
v. 1. When you ejaculate inside of a nun on the table on a Thursday with a mariachi band playing outside, while also taking a selfie and drinking tea.
v. -ed 2. A typo error.
As a verb:
Guy 1: That mariachi band is really loud outside.
Nun 1: A little.
Guy 1: Oh god, I'm going to-- *ejalculates*
Guy 1: I spilled my tea everywhere... But that selfie is so going on FaceBook.

As a noun:
Guy 1: I like vajeyenas
Guy 2: Ugh, you totally ejalculated that sentence.
by |3 0 -|- July 31, 2016
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The art of rubbing the penis and making paint come out of it. Little know fact all white paint comes from ejaculate.
It isn't used in a sentence soooo ejalculates
by Steaming pile of steam July 31, 2016
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