A network that shuns the best sport in the world, hockey, and obsesses over the worst league in the world, the NBA. And also obsesses over the stupidest things for the LONGEST time (ie. penn st, tebow, jeremy lin, NFL in general)
"And now ESPN's top plays, or should i say top play, because it's the same dunk over and over that we have all seen hundreds of times before."
by amcoho4 March 13, 2012
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The ability of very dumb blondes to read peoples minds
dumb blonde- wow! it is like I have ESPN or something
by Jacob Parker May 6, 2005
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Claims to be a "worldwide leader in sports". a malignant misconception since they don't cover F1 racing,rugby or motoGP just to mention a few international sports!!
More like the "leader in US sports!"

1st character:"I wish ESPN could at least cover the F1 racing highlights….."
2nd character:"…SSShhhhhh....they are talking about Barry Bonds on ESPN Hollywood!!!!!!"

by muri29 September 25, 2006
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Popular Sports Channel. Acronym that stands for Eastern Sports Promotion Network. Will usually see things like the latest Terell Owens coverage, drooling over Tom Brandy, the latest routene Derek Jeter play, the latest Manny Ramirez bitch fit, or why the ACC is better than all other conferences. Also has lame stories that try to prove sports worth when in all aspects it's just a game. Also made watching cards on T.V. popular. Also never stops covering the Chicago Cubs, Barry Bonds, LeBron James, Kobe Bryan/Phil Jackson, and Lance Armstrong (a.k.a. national fraud).
Friend: Dude, did you watch ESPN tonight?
Me: Yeah, they did not say who won the world series in 2005 but I'm so glad I know that T.O. has a contract dispute, and just what the yankees and red sox need to do get to the World Series in 2006.

Or great programing like this:
Peter Gammons: I know the Red Sox suck but I just think everyone wants to see them win the world series again.
Harold Renyolds: I think the Cubs are going to win although their manager is a dolt, they have no bullpen, and half their pitching has never finnished a full season, I like their chances.
by Dusticles November 14, 2005
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the best channel to watch. It has the thing that matters most in life sports.
I love ESPN, it has everything to live for
by joe c September 2, 2004
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Fop definition for ESP. Devised by residents of the Une.
Mees: "I have ESPN!"

Meester: "Uh, you mean, ESP?"
by meester February 1, 2007
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The ability to see future sporting event outcomes.
I have ESPN.
by tortugadude May 28, 2009
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