D-wood

   /dee-wʊd/ Show Spelledd-wood

–noun
1. the act of misplacing, damaging, or destroying ones cellular phone in fantastic style; (see example 1 below)
2. the girl one always finds lost outside of Dicey Riley's, usually without cellular phone, and sometimes lying beneath the table;
3. the girl one always finds wandering through Dirty Blondes, a.k.a. Blondies, usually without cellular phone, due to sun damage;
4. the girl one always finds at McGuire Hill 16, usually without cellular phone or shoes, due to excessive alcohol consumption.

–verb (used with object)
5. to misplace, damage, or destroy ones cellular phone in fantastic style; (See example 2 below)

—idioms
6. knock on D-wood, used when knocking on D-wood to assure continued good luck with cellular phone: (See example 3 below) Also, especially British, touch D-wood;
7. out of the D-woods;
a. out of a dangerous, perplexing, or difficult situation where loss of cellular phone is highly likely
b. no longer in precarious or critical condition where cellular phone loss is most likely to occur;

Origin:
bef. 900; ME; OE dee-wudu, earlier di-widu; c. ON vithr, OHG witu, OIr fid
1. "I tried calling you this morning, but you must have pulled another D-wood last night!"

2. "Wow, I can't believe you d-wooded your cell for the 13th time this year, you must be Verizon's biggest customer!"

3. "My cellie still works even though I just jumped into the pool with it in my pocket, knock on D-wood!"
by showmeyourtds October 16, 2010
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King of debunking and exposing Islam the most obvious false cult in the world

D wood is lethal, nuff said
D wood is short for David wood, the ex atheist turned christian YouTuber

Don’t mess with d wood, he’ll fuck you up with a sledgehammer, yes I went there. In all seriousness though, islam has no chance against d wood

Even zakir naik fears d wood which in itself isn’t saying much since zakir naik is a joke
by Myrestlessness August 28, 2022
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