one who cums in only two strokes
Dude, my girlfriend Angie was giving me a hand job, I came in two strokes!

David, your a fucking minuteman.
by Bob McSoupe July 21, 2010
David

A little dickhead who thinks he knows everything
Is a drug addict
And is a video game freak also known as one of the best gamers but hes a twat
David also spreads aids

A little dickhead who thinks he knows everything and is a video game addict

Takes strong drugs and is clumsy

David is a boy you you would want to punch and throw him in the sewers!
By Marc olsson~
Pass the ball David
David: stfu Im messi I will get pass the team don't watch.
by marc olsson March 10, 2015
David

1. A male (normally a douche-dag) that makes plans and cancels at the last minute
2. A run of the mill d-bag

Old usage:
1. Long haired white boy

Slang:
Pulling a David
To make plans and cancel after having a friend drive across town
James: Why did you pull a David and never show up to the bar

Hitler: Whoa bro, there was a family emergency, I can't believe you would think I would do that. I have my days but I'm not a David
by notmyrealname.mpeg September 04, 2014
A small man who acts intelligent but isn't really. Recently had an accident in the mouth area. His friends find his sister HOT and wonder how he could be her sister.
"wow his sisters hot but not that David"
by frances1234566790 March 17, 2013
A musketeer whose hair changes colors. Also a Homestuck character, apparently.
When in doubt, use David's typical comeback: "Because I'm the best."
by Definitely not David October 26, 2011
David, sometimes pernounced Jub-Jub, is French for veiny hard bee penis. A person who has personality, in his own way, and is addicted to shitty videogames and anime. His appearence is discribed as a feral cave man, who can't help but to smack things with his dick. Fucks honey bees in his spare time. A David is wildly attracted to young male leprechauns, and vice versa targeted most by Irish sexual predaters for the looseness of his ass and the relaxed nature when under stress. David's can usualy survive for weeks only buy the nutrition provided by the up to 30 gallons of semen stored in their single hump. Is prone to PMS or acting women like, although he is probaly male. David's are now nearly extinct due to overhunting for their pelts, semen sacks, and estrogen. If you see a David, it would be best to perform a mercy killing with sand paper and a straw hat.
If you see the David, kill the David.
Why?
When threteded, they bare their tusks and charge unstopingly.
by MrPank May 29, 2011
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