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Cryptdick

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A Penis covered with any blue substances, or a blue Penis.
So I was sippin dat blueberry slushie, pissin me off!! Anyways, I spilt some of dat shit on my dick and it got real blue. My bitch looks all confused and shit and I'm like "bitch, dats just my cryptdick."
by andmch January 27, 2010
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Cryptdick

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someone who whines and complains about life being unfair, and uses name-calling to justify their immature behavior against freedom of speech, thinking only their views matter and ends the conversation with negative feedback instead of finding a rational solution.
That person is such a cryptdick; because I'm not allowed to state my views on what is morally appropriate, and that person just puts a k to the conversation with name calling to avoid a point being made.
by Gee smoke June 13, 2025
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Cryptic metaphor

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A line made famous by flash animation veteran, Egoraptor, in his spoof of the game Metal Gear Solid, "Metal Gear Awesome". This is uttered aloud, by Vulcan Raven, referring to the fact that Snakes have no arms, and since Revolver Ocelot gets his arm cut off, it symbolses that he is going to be the next snake, making a cryptic metaphor. This exclamation can also be used by standing silently behind a complete stranger and pointing at them, and waiting for them to turn around, and when they do, shouting "CRYPTIC METAPHOR." And walking away without further comment.
1. Snake: Oh, gee whiz, I hope a tank isn't gonna totally come outta nowhere and OWN me.

*tank shoots snake*

Snake: YOU KNOW... SERIOUSLY... I'M GETTING A LITTLE FUCKING PISSED OFF!!!

Meryl: Hey, Snake, a tank is gonna totally...

Snake: SHUT UP!!

Raven: CRYPTIC METAPHOR.

Snake: Do you seriously think this is fucking fair?

Raven: ...Just throw grenades at me.

Snake: Oh.

*explosion*

Snake: Awsum!

Raven *laughs* I gave him more than a raven could hunt for in the night.

Ocelot: What?!

Raven: The snake prowls feircely, but cannot scratch his back, for as the sioux people are aware of, snakes have no arms with which to scratch their back.

Ocelot: ...Shut up.

Raven: The Raven on my head thirsts for his blood!

Raven's tattoo: DAMN RIGHT, NIGGA, mm-MM!!

2. Mungo: So what are you doing this weekend?

Zodiac: CRYPTIC METAPHOR!!!

Mungo: Cheapass! You did that last week!
by Dr. Zodiac October 25, 2009
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A coalescence of 'cryptic' and 'dick'

Cryp- mixed messages;lies
Dick- Thinks with his-;Is a-

A crypdick may also be one or any number of the following: playa,gimp,wannabe,manwhore,waste of perfectly good space

Get rid.
"That crypdick ain't worth your time"
by Joasia April 15, 2007
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1. Having a hidden meaning.
2. Secret or mysterious.
3. Using code.
by Cryptic December 10, 2003
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Cryptic Shitbags

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When someone is being very Cryptic and withholding important information or news.

This person knows that you desperately need this information, but as they are a Cryptic Shitbag they release only tiny bits of information, despite many hours of questioning, politeness and bribery.

They may imply and insuate possible answers, but often these answers only contain the smallest nuggets of truth.

These people are Cryptic Shitbags.
Rufus: You were gone a long time, did your Mum tell you when and where the Funeral will be?
GF: No. She's playing Cryptic Shitbags.
by Little Brown Bear November 24, 2011
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