To be cremated, on fire, or soon to be either while maintaining the process of masturbation
As the train careened down a mountain pass blazing a fiery red a nun shouted, "heavens my son, what are you doing?" The sailor replied, "Oh my god, I'm on fire, but damn it sister, we are going to die a fiery blaze and since you won't I need to tug one out for the final time in a desperate act of cremasturbation!""Don't forget to repent," said the nun."No time, but I am an atheist anyways, thank you though!"
by Doof Cooper McGoof December 16, 2008