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1.
A new language that looks and sounds just like English, but is actually lies and propaganda spewed forth by big corporations that just want people to be good consumers and give them their money.

Often accompanied by Legalesein barely readable fine print, or spoken rapidly.

Should you send a complaint to a big corporation, you can expect to be handed back a sheet of paper with corporate bullshit on it.
"Reebok cares about young athletes, our products are designed to help you achieve your goals."

"We at microsoft are always working to ensure that users get the most from their computers"
by Humphro April 03, 2005