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22.
Cat
1. Noun. An small furry animal that ignores you when you want to pet it, and bothers you endlessly when you're trying to get shit done, or when it's hungry. Cats are generally even tempered and calm. They spend most of their adult life sleeping and eating. Cats require little energy, as all they ask for is a bowl of food twice a day and a warm place to sleep. You do not need to walk a cat or spend hours a day spending time with it. Cats are excellent animals for dorm or apartment life, and are perfect for people with busy lifestyles. They adapt to change quickly and require little money to keep. Cats can reduce stress levels, as there is nothing more relaxing than watching and petting a warm, sleepy cat. If you do not feed your cat too much, it will also keep your home relatively free of vermin, including mice, rats, a few roaches, moths, flies, and anything else it can catch. Be warned though, cats have a genetic attraction to computer keyboards. They will often walk around/sleep on a keyboard, and have a tendency to push the delete or backspace button (A cat once deleted half my term paper by doing this.) However, the bad behaviors of a cat are greatly outnumbered by the good. A cat will bring 5 joys for every one mad (lolspeak). Many are in need of a good home, so please go get yourself a cat.
Mike: What the hell is that?
Steve: It's my cat dude.
Mike: Really? It's so quiet, compact and warm. I like it a lot.
Steve: Yeah, ever since I got this cat ladies love me, I get better grades, and my penis is bigger.
Mike: Wow! I think I'm gonna get a cat.
Steve: Be warned though. This cat deleted my Thesis paper on the Industrial Revolution
Mike: That's okay. The good points of a cat far outweigh the bad ones.
Steve: Damn Straight.
by naylordude424 November 13, 2009
81 25
 
1.
Cat
The definitive pet.
Cleans self. Knows how to catch it's food.
Probably gave humans the idea for a "vaccum." Is intelligent and curious.
Likes to lay around alot, sort of like a couch potato. That's cool though.

They are usually quiet and know where to use the bathroom, unlike dogs.
Cats rule, dogs drool. Remember that.
by SuperSonicX November 15, 2004
10184 2902
 
2.
cat
A quite pleasant furry creature that vaguely resembles a meatloaf. Cats are the most intellectually superior creature on Earth. They are particularly adept at training human beings to do their bidding, and spend 18 hours a day on average apparently sleeping. What they are really doing is coming up with ways to take over the Earth while still retaining humans to make that yummy cat food for them. If cats had opposable thumbs, they, not us, would be the dominant force on this planet.
"Is that a meatloaf???"
"No, it's my cat!"
by gadjitfreek July 29, 2007
3302 806
 
3.
CAT
A person, usually male and generally considered or thought to be cool.
After meeting a new group of people one may say to his or her friends "Those cats were allright."

Where is that cat?

I haven't seen him in a while. That cat's getting fat.
by Bro May 13, 2004
3459 1338
 
4.
cat
a cool muscian, usually a jazzer who can play extremely well.
Now that cat can play.
by Aleks March 01, 2004
2150 877
 
5.
He set us up the bomb. Also took all our base.
It's you!
by MoonKnight November 28, 2002
1371 333
 
6.
cat
An adorable little domestic animal of the feline persuasion, which "cat" is usually referred to.

Can be obnoxious sometimes, but mainly in a playful/cute way. Intelligent, independent, demure, cuddly... and viscious fighters should a fight build up. A mainly carnivorous animal, cats keep your home free of pesky animals, and especially rodents.

Birds, for better or worse, won't build their nests near your house.

As adorable as they are, cats aren't as sweet and gentle as they may seem... they look rather annoyed when they hear themselves called "pookums", "widdle cutums" and other similar names.

But it is fun watching them bat at insects or dangling strings, attacking your blanket-covered toes in the morning, one or more kitties curled up on the couch...
Taffy, a big orange tabby, and Nite (night), a smaller "tuxedo" cat, are cuddle up in their basket... suddenly an owner comes in.

Owner: "He-wo! Good morning my widdle diddymses!"

The cats look up, rather indignant.

Owner: "Did my widdle poi tats sweep o tay, did 'em? Did 'em? How's my widdle kitty pusses?"

Taffy and Nite look at each other and puke simultaneously.

Taffy: This is one disturbed girl, isn't she?

Nite: Darn straight. Somebody tell her to shut up.
by diddims March 23, 2005
1596 640
 
7.
Cat
Better than a human could ever be. Here's why-
1) Look into a cat's face. You should be able to tell that they know something you don't.
2) They get to sleep 18 hours a day and play for the entire other 6.
3) Who is cleaning up who's litter box here?
4) They are able to move faster than you can, can land on their feet, and can move through tighter spaces than you can.
5) Dogs have owners; Cats have staff.
Cats are simply better than you.
by musicfan62 March 17, 2009
909 317