Bret: Yeah I fucked her bro, she was a good root.
Person: You're such a Bret, I don't believe you.
Bret: I swear to God.
Person 1: Can you smell something?
Person 2: Oh there's just a Bret talking over there.
Person 1: Fuck, it stinks like shit.
Person: You're such a Bret, I don't believe you.
Bret: I swear to God.
Person 1: Can you smell something?
Person 2: Oh there's just a Bret talking over there.
Person 1: Fuck, it stinks like shit.
by dontdribbleshit May 25, 2012
by BigMike1212 April 15, 2010
Bret Is the Sexiest Guy in the World He plays Hockey and after he has girls suck his big juicy dick!!
Definetly the hottest guy in the world.
Definetly the hottest guy in the world.
Bret Is Hot.
by Breta.d May 10, 2022
obsessed with whatshisname.
"Bret, dude, your fucking nuts. Quit talking about that guy and get a fucking life will you dickhead"
by youdon'tknowme! November 25, 2011
by myroflcoptergoSOISOISO September 12, 2009
Get the Bret mug.
A person who makes up fake stories about their life to make himself look more interesting. Then they make you feel like a bad person when you find out they were lying and confront them about it.
Bret: "One time my dad hit me with a train when I was 2, and I wore a cast for my arm and 3 band aids for 6 days. One time when I was 10, I got into a fight with 8 Navy Seals and won. I simply kicked every one of them in the balls, one by one. They all got a dishonorary discharge for getting beaten up by a child. I'm from Rome, Romania, and I used to eat Ramen noodles there all the time b/c they're an authentic Romanian dish. I spoke French, because that's the #1 most common language spoken there. Also, I'm adopted."
Person 1: "I don't think any of that is true . Also, isn't Rome in Italy?"
Bret: "You think I don't know about my own country? What would you know? You're just a stupid American."
Person 1: "Okay! I'm sorry."
Bret: "Billie Eilish asked me out once while I was in the gym. I said no, b/c I was dating Zendaya at the time. Once I was sent away to a poultry farm to live among the chickens in their tiny cages because my parents hated me. I had to share a cage with 50 roosters for 7 yrs, and the farmers almost turned me into chicken nuggets 8 times."
Person 1: "I feel like that's not true."
Bret: "Why would I lie about something like that? I'm trying to share a traumatic event with you & your 1st response is to question me and invalidate my experience?"
Person 1: "Uh.."
Bret: "I grew up my entire life as a homeless child, b/c my adopted parents have no jobs."
Person 1: "Your parents are literally brain surgeons."
Bret: "SHUT UP DYLAN!"
Person 1: "I don't think any of that is true . Also, isn't Rome in Italy?"
Bret: "You think I don't know about my own country? What would you know? You're just a stupid American."
Person 1: "Okay! I'm sorry."
Bret: "Billie Eilish asked me out once while I was in the gym. I said no, b/c I was dating Zendaya at the time. Once I was sent away to a poultry farm to live among the chickens in their tiny cages because my parents hated me. I had to share a cage with 50 roosters for 7 yrs, and the farmers almost turned me into chicken nuggets 8 times."
Person 1: "I feel like that's not true."
Bret: "Why would I lie about something like that? I'm trying to share a traumatic event with you & your 1st response is to question me and invalidate my experience?"
Person 1: "Uh.."
Bret: "I grew up my entire life as a homeless child, b/c my adopted parents have no jobs."
Person 1: "Your parents are literally brain surgeons."
Bret: "SHUT UP DYLAN!"
by therealoxforddictionary1 April 18, 2022