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11.
The phrase Blue Screen of Death has its origins in the maritime trade, particularly buccaneer lore of the sixteenth century. When a ship is sunk, all that is left is the morbidly still ocean, glistening bright blue in the Caribbean sun. Thus, when one heads out to sea, with the intention of meeting another boat, and all one sees is the rolling blue ocean, one can sadly assume that that boat has sunk.

The phrase became absorbed into common language as a term referring to the feeling of empty hopelessness one experiences when faced with a vast expanse of watery oblivion. Staring out into Lake Windermere, the great poet William Bleak was sufficiently moved by the still blueness that he wrote his masterpiece "Songs of Death", eventually going on to kick-start the goth movement.

With the advent of air travel in the twentieth century, it became applicable to the sky, as well as the sea: many an early airman was deemed lost to the Blue Screen of Death (although quite a few of them simply turned out to have gotten slightly lost and landed in the wrong place). Over time the Blue Screen has become synonymous with loss, emptiness and to some, the Devil.

The association of the colour blue with death, watery or otherwise, is readily visible throughout modern civilisation. Household cleaners such as bleach are packaged in blue bottles, in memory of those who, when the product was new to the market, mistook it for cheap ouzo and passed away through dissolution of the digestive tract. When one sings "The Blues" one is reflecting on the brevity of life, and the oblivion that awaits in death. Cheese and onion crisps, known to be the foulest of all snack foods, often come packaged in blue to ward off the purchaser.

With this in mind, that the "Blue Screen of Death" is the most chilling and deadly entity in computer science is no surprise. They have been plaguing computer operators since someone had the bright idea of connecting a screen to a computer. This is one of the most puzzling phenomina in computing since during the 60's, 70's and 80's the Blue Screen of Death was able to manifest itself in full blueness on green and amber monochrome cathode, black and white, and two tone LCD screens

The Blue Screen of Death was slipped into the very core of the Windows operating system at its inception, by a malicious developer with a sick interest in pagan rites. It is rumoured that when one sees the Blue Screen of Death on a computer screen it wrenches a tiny part of your soul and binds it to the afflicted machine. Repeated exposure, legend has it, will eventually drain one's spirit, leaving a living corpse, pale and restless, existing without purpose and an unquenchable thirst for caffeine.

A recent evolution of the "Blue Screen of Death" feature in Windows Vista has serious side effects. Instead of simply displaying a "blue screen", the new variant displays random flashing colors in a superhypnobrainwave pattern, causing the user to have a seizure and die within 195 hours of continuous seizure. The seizures are extremely painful for the 195 hours, then the seizure-ee suddenly feels a jabbing pain in their lower upper thigh and dies. 96.3141592% of these seizures last for the full 195 hours. The colors of the screen randomly flash between red, green and blue and actually cause death, so this variant of the "Blue Screen" should instead be called an epileptic screen of red, green and blue death, but Microsoft have decided to make the feature part of their new family of software - creating "Windows Live Screen of Death Beta".

The blue screen of death has had many social consequences. The Catholic Church has condemmed the blue screen of death for promoting a "culture of death". Instead, the church favors the "Ooops" kernel messages generated by linux. The phrase "Ooops" is a sacred part of Roman Catholic tradition, as it is the sound an Irish women makes when she realizes that the rythem method of birth control doesn't work.

A recent study conducted by an up and coming university Massachusetts Institute of Technology, located in Chicago, has managed to determine the Blue Screen of Death as cause of other incidents. It was an extensive study, conducted for over 30 years by a group of under-fed under-grad students.

Incidents: broken computer equipment; violent crime and suicide increase; loss of data and home made movies; wet floor and terrified expression on the face of a person that used the computer last; mysterious deaths of occupants in high-tech residences; increase in drugs abuse; and many more.

It is also possible to see a yellow screen of death, if you are colour-blind. While the BSOD has been known to cause many many heartattacks, it has also been known to cause coniptions as well as the ability to gain super human strength and shoot eye beams into your computer monitor. Please, do not have a heart attack if it happens to you.
“Damn You Bill Gates.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Blue screen of death
by kodiac1 July 05, 2006
 
29.
the blue message screen that comes up when an error occurs while using Microsoft Windows
Not the blue screen of death again. This is the third time in a week it's come up.
by Light Joker November 23, 2005
 
30.
Something that happens after every half hour on a Microsoft Windows 98 or lower. Get an XP, dorks!
That's my 129th BSOD today and counting...
by TheBurninator December 09, 2003
 
31.
Contrary to popular belief, the Blue screen of death is actually a program designed to stop you computer and prevent harm being done by maybe a mis-read line of code or an invalid argument. And for all of those who complain bout losing their essays, get OpenOffice, it has document recovery, dumb asses.
P1 - Oh no I just got the Blue Screen of death!
Tech Guy - Oh no, that is not a crash, you computer is just shutting down to prevent a fatal system error
by MERGERFLERGERBERGER February 14, 2012
 
32.
Also abbreviated as BSOD, the Blue Screen of Death is:

1. The most terrifying thing even to appear on the monitor of your PC unbidden. Happens quite frequently when one's GPU is on the fritz.

2. The reason the color blue makes me uneasy.
1. Hmm, a new Java game. Looks interes- wait, why did my screen turn black suddenly... OH SHIT IT'S A BSOD! AGH! HELP! HELP!

2. I don't like that shirt. It's the same shade as a Blue Screen of Death. Please don't wear it again, or at least sit a little farther away. And stop laughing at me, it's not funny. It's not funny!
by Shalstev January 18, 2010
 
33.
something that happens when you run windows vista for no longer then 10 minutes. usually when your doing something very important or just beating your meat.
last night i was beating my meat to female/female/donkey action and i got a blue screen of death. so i picked up my computer and threw it out the fucking windows and smoked a cig after.
by dopemane November 05, 2009
 
34.
n. common
Due to the extreme fragility and bugginess of Microsoft Windows,
misbehaving applications can readily crash the OS
(and the OS sometimes crashes itself spontaneously).
The Blue Screen of Death, sometimes decorated with hex error codes,
is what you get when this happens. (Commonly abbreviated BSOD.)
It is often impossible to recover cleanly from a BSOD. The blue screen of death can strike anywhere.
At the Comdex trade show, Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates
encountered the Blue Screen of Death during a demonstration of Windows 98.
(He had a spare computer standing by).
by notposs May 06, 2006
 
35.
n. common
Due to the extreme fragility and bugginess of Microsoft Windows,
misbehaving applications can readily crash the OS
(and the OS sometimes crashes itself spontaneously).
The Blue Screen of Death, sometimes decorated with hex error codes,
is what you get when this happens. (Commonly abbreviated BSOD.)
It is often impossible to recover cleanly from a BSOD. The blue screen of death can strike anywhere.
At the Comdex trade show, Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates
encountered the Blue Screen of Death during a demonstration of Windows 98.
(He had a spare computer standing by).
by notposs April 26, 2006