Top definition
The act of placing a pinky finger up someone's butt hole and they proceed to fart on their finger. This could be a form of surprise or planned attempt. Another form of a Baumert is shoving two fingers up someone's butt hole and due to the pressure of said action, they poop on your fingers. However if the poop is normal poop, this is not a Baumert (unless they fart; that's an elephant Baumert) The poop has to be wet and juicy. A tapping Baumert is a continuation of putting your finger up someone's butt hole and they poop within the time frame that the finger(s) are not in the butt hole. This is usually chaotic. Reminder, this is not considered rape if they fart or poop. This is common for women to do to men.
Girl: "Hey, do you want to Baumert?"
Boy: "No..."
Girl: "To bad"
*Girl begins to perform a tapping Baumert until the man farts AND poops grossly on her fingers*
Girl: "My fingers smell like shit"
Boy: "I pooped on your fingers."
by mynamesnotrick July 09, 2012
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The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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