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1.
The base unit of length in the International System of Ass Units (ASS-I). Equivalent to around 12.457 meters or the distance between Dr. Kamal's office and the BME lab.
Mike: "Hey bro, where did you park today?"

Marek: "Approximately 23.4 Ass Meters from here"

Mike: "I see what you did there you fuck!"
by supersubmarinesemen November 07, 2011
 
2.
A scale - typically between 1 and 100 - by which an individual or group is measured, based upon how much of an ass they are being.
Stop picking on me - you are at about a 75 on the ass meter right now.
by JSlo November 20, 2013