A fail that, when examined extremely closely, fails in a very different and surprising way to the one expected.

Reflects the strange behaviour of subatomic particles when observed.
The contract seemed reasonable, but when I examined the small print I realised it was a QUANTUM FAIL.
by LFDD April 5, 2010
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A rare form of fellatio in which the performer becomes so enthralled by the act, that all sense of time and place are lost, and a trance like state is attained.
Guy 1: Dude, I got the best Quantum BJ last night.
Guy2: Oh yea?
Guy 1: Yea man, she totally spaced out to like another dimension or something she was so into it. When she snapped out of it, she forgot her name and where she was for a minute.
Guy 2: Nice!
by Southern_Gent September 10, 2013
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The involuntary time travel into the future immediately after slightly waking up and drifting into sleep again. Quantum Sleep is triggered by a later-to-be-regretted thought or phrase "let me sleep five more minutes". Quantum Sleep transports you through an hour in what seemed like two minutes. The result is lateness and thus alters the events of the day. Derived from Quantum Leap.
Before: Let me catch five more minutes of sleep.

...Quantum Sleep...

After: Shit! fucking hell, I am hectically late.

unemployment boss appointment regret quantum shit
by Baniroquai Rewo November 19, 2010
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Infinitely small penis
"Fuarkk Dan has quantum penis" , "yea i heard it's tiny"
by GeoffreyCharlestheThird June 11, 2017
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A common euphemism for gay anal sex between a student and a professor, especially when the student is the submissive (receiving) partner and the professor is the dominant (penetrating) partner. This phrase is thought to have originated at Caltech, though it has also become common at Stanford and MIT.
Gautam: Has anyone seen Andrea lately?
Navid: I think he's in his advisor's office... probably studying quantum cryptography <knowing look>
Jialin: Wow! They've been in there three hours!
by CallsItWhatItIs July 6, 2017
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(Active noun) When a person reaches a point of crazy that it cannot be fathomed how many dimensions the crazy extends.
Crazy, ex girlfriend, Crazy ex, mother in law, politicians
She's quantum crazy! She is 8 shades of crazy plus two or three and we can only comprehend 6.
by GaiaDesiree December 30, 2015
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1 Sexual interaction by means of e-mail, IM or text messaging.

2 The person with whom you have virtual sex.
My Quantum Fuck is incredibly hot. Last night he quantum fucked me so well I lost the ability to type for a few minutes.
by Petunia Farmer January 20, 2009
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