On St Patrick’s Day in a crowded bar in a women’s bathroom you pee on the only roll of toilet paper in the bar because you are from jersey and that’s how you roll.
The bitches were pounding on the bathroom door to hurry up so I gave them the Jersey wet wipe and bailed.
by KorinaRina April 17, 2019
Noun
1. A wad of toilet paper that you have spit onto in an attempt to cleanse intimate areas after using the restroom necessitated by the unavailability (particularly in the deep south, e.g. Alabama) of legitimate baby wipes or wet wipes.
1. A wad of toilet paper that you have spit onto in an attempt to cleanse intimate areas after using the restroom necessitated by the unavailability (particularly in the deep south, e.g. Alabama) of legitimate baby wipes or wet wipes.
I was visiting friends that live in Alabama and after I dropped a deuce I was stunned to see that there were no wet wipes to use, so I was forced to improvise and make an Alabama Wet Wipe.
by Sweitzerman August 23, 2018
When you have a massive swamp ass, on a really hot day, then wipe it on the nose of a sleeping friend.
by Hufrtd July 17, 2015
Using one’s own sock or socks to wash and wipe the asshole after dropping a horrifically mud butt style shit or accidentally shitting oneself and there is no toilet paper or other tissue.
A Texas wet wipe is used out of absolute necessity and desperation.
The sock or socks are removed and are made thoroughly wet and moist in the sink (if available) and the ass is cleansed accordingly. The socks must always be disposed of or better yet, just left behind on the floor. Never flushed.
A Texas wet wipe is used out of absolute necessity and desperation.
The sock or socks are removed and are made thoroughly wet and moist in the sink (if available) and the ass is cleansed accordingly. The socks must always be disposed of or better yet, just left behind on the floor. Never flushed.
After spending the entire day drinking beer and eating hot wings, I headed home. After about a mile, I felt the gut bubblies. Hoping to release some pressure, I unloaded what I thought was a massive fart but ended up shitting my pants. I spotted a gas station on the corner and quickly headed to the shitter. I waddled to the door praying the steamy, oozing, wet lump would not slide any further down my leg. I made it to the stall only to find there was no toilet paper or paper towels. I slipped off both socks knowing a Texas wet wipe was my only alternative. I moistened them in the sink and then I slid the cold, wet socks up and down my ass crack like dental floss cleaning what had to look like the field at a tractor pull and a rooster’s tail when it came out. I got it as clean as I could get it and at least enough to not itch too much before I got home, I tossed my socks in the corner and slipped my boots back on and headed on my way.
by Dick Onchin November 3, 2020
Using one’s own sock or socks to wash and wipe the asshole after dropping a horrifically mud butt style shit or accidentally shitting oneself and there is no toilet paper or other tissue.
A Texas wet wipe is used out of absolute necessity and desperation.
The sock or socks are removed and are made thoroughly wet and moist in the sink (if available) and the ass is cleansed accordingly. The socks must always be disposed of or better yet, just left behind on the floor. Never flushed.
A Texas wet wipe is used out of absolute necessity and desperation.
The sock or socks are removed and are made thoroughly wet and moist in the sink (if available) and the ass is cleansed accordingly. The socks must always be disposed of or better yet, just left behind on the floor. Never flushed.
After spending the entire day drinking beer and eating hot wings, I headed home. After about a mile, I felt the gut bubblies. Hoping to release some pressure, I unloaded what I thought was a massive fart but ended up shitting my pants. I spotted a gas station on the corner and quickly headed to the shitter. I waddled to the door praying the steamy, oozing, wet lump would not slide any further down my leg. I made it to the stall only to find there was no toilet paper or paper towels. I slipped off both socks knowing a Texas wet wipe was my only alternative. I moistened them in the sink and then I slid the cold, wet socks up and down my ass crack like dental floss cleaning what had to look like the field at a tractor pull and a rooster’s tail when it came out. I got it as clean as I could get it and at least enough to not itch too much before I got home, I tossed my socks in the corner and slipped my boots back on and headed on my way.
by Dick Onchin November 3, 2020
When you clean your hands at a restaurant by rubbing the condensation off of your glass and then wiping your hands clean with a napkin. This maneuver is most commonly used at diners where the bathroom is so filthy that using the sink leaves you less sanitary than when you walked in.
"Hey man, do you need to wash your hands before we leave? You had a lot of those wings"
"Nah, that bathroom looks like the inside of a silver back gorilla's anus, I'll just use the Diner Wet Wipe"
"Nah, that bathroom looks like the inside of a silver back gorilla's anus, I'll just use the Diner Wet Wipe"
by SultanofFez January 8, 2019
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