Johnstown, PA 

A city in Western Pennsylvania of around 28,000 and shrinking, and unfortunately my hometown. Johnstown, though once a hive of activity from the steel and coal industries, is now a dying town that is barely kept alive by skilled industries such as healthcare and pharmaceuticals. Johnstown is now populated mainly by retirees, who labor under the delusion that you can still get a job in the stillmill. Most young people stay in the area long enough to finish up school or college, and then move on to greener pastures.

Johnstown has very little social activities other than churches and bars, sometimes within 10 feet of each other. If you are not a working-class Catholic who likes cheap beer, you are very unlikely to feel connected to this community.

Welcome to Johnstown, PA, please check your vitality and ambition at the door.

Johnstown, PA by angelfire March 29, 2015

Johnstown Flood 

The act of Butt-Chugging a 25oz can of Domestic beer and showering the contents onto your lover over the edge of a table.

I received the best Johnstown Flood of my life last night. We then watched goon and ate pizza rolls. I am in love!

Johnstown Flood by Jon town December 13, 2017

johnstown, pa 

Don't forget to mention that if you don't hunt, fish, eat cabbage, like the Steelers, drink beer, go to bars to hook up, have an opinionated closed mind, ride an ATV and a motorcycle...you simply will not fit in in this town

johnstown, pa
beer
Steelers
bars

johnstown, pa by seen it all in Johnstown May 8, 2011

Johnstown, PA 

A town of about 30,000 residents in southwest Pennsylvania 90 minutes east of Pittsburgh. Its claim to fame is the Johnstown Flood of 1889, in which more than 2,200 died--the deadliest disaster in the U.S. until 9/11. The people are very nice in Johnstown, PA, but the town is extraordinarily religious, maybe because there is not much to do other than go to church, bowling, or to a dive bar. Newcomers may find it difficult to break into the well established social groups, since most of the residents have known each other since childhood. It has quite a number of large cemeteries. The population is mostly white. There are very, very few sidewalks and limited public transportation in this very hilly town. Unemployment is a serious problem here and the average wage is almost unlivably low, but housing costs are low, too. The main sources of employment are health care, defense, telemarketing, and retail.

I'm reluctant to stay in Johnstown, PA, because I will die broke, bored, and lonely.

Johnstown, PA by LostSalamander December 26, 2010

Johnstown NY 

Similar to its neighbor, Gloversville, but with slightly less ugly appearance, Johnstown is one of the most pointless places to live. At a first glance, Johnstown seems like the nicest place on Earth but in reality there is absolutely nothing to do and 95% of the population consists of inbred hicks whose ancestors have lived here for hundreds of years. The remaining 5% of the population move there. The town, which has less than 10,000 people living in it, is littered with filthy scumbags, bad parenting, unbelievably high taxes, a "mall" with 5 shops and a movieplex, and of course, actual litter. No one bothers to clean it up, except for on the rail trail, where the trash reappears almost instantly. Several people have been killed on said rail trail, which runs through Johnstown and Gloversville. Your best luck at finding a job here is at Burger King or Dunkin' Donuts. Many people only stay here because it is "safer" than other nearby cities.

I live in New York." "NEW YORK CITY?!" "No, Johnstown NY." "Oh..that's cool..

Johnstown NY by lololololhai January 22, 2011

Johnstown jalopy 

A once mediocre economy car that has lost 80% of its value over the course of 4 years after being abused in the hands of its mentally challenged owner. Usually owned by either inbreds, crackheads, autist, Walmart DC workers, or ratchet side hoes. Usually has signs of damage all around the vehicle, and occasionally visual modifications applied in poor taste. Drivers hobbies include texting while driving on their iPhone that's at least 3 generations old, spilling Dunkin iced coffees on their stained seats, and blasting garbage music from their blown speakers.

Jenny: Hey Becky, did you ever get with that guy you met on tinder last night?

Becky: No, he came to pick me up to bring me back to his studio apt. so we could watch his free-trial of Netflix, but the passenger door handle of his Johnstown jalopy fell off so I couldn't go

Johnstown jalopy by mac daddy cjizzle September 27, 2018

Johnstown Jackoff 

to have a homeless man help you masturbate, and during your climax said homeless man takes a shit on your chest

Bill: "OMFG!!! that johnstown jackoff was the best"

Jerry: "ya thank god he was a semi-clean homeless man"

Johnstown Jackoff by The Pi Guy17 September 26, 2009