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stuart fletcher's definitions

Vibrator

<noun>
1) The reason she has a headache.
2) Straight men's worst enemy.
3) A phallic object which vibrates, primarily used to hand women an easy orgasm.
1)
JESSIE: "I have a headache, dear."
JAMES: "... Bitch."
2)
JAMES: "You were in the bathroom a long time, oh well let's get down!"
JESSIE: "I don't feel like it any more."
JAMES: "... Bitch."
3)
JAMES: "How about tonight then?"
JESSIE: "I'm using a vibrator James, I don't need you anymore."
JAMES: "... Bitch."
by Stuart Fletcher January 17, 2005
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United Kingdom

<noun>
United Kingdom is the shortened version of what is the 'United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland' which can be further abbreviated to simply the U.K.
The United Kingdom is comprised of four states, in order of size, England the largest, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland.
The main language of the U.K. is English, but other languages such as Scottish Gaelic, Welsh and Irish Gaelic are also spoken in more remote parts.
The U.K. is situated in an archapelago of islands off the North Western coast of the European continent. Great Britain (England, Scotland and Wales) being the largest of the islands. The islands surrounding Britain are also a part of the U.K.
"I live in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland."
"So you are British then?"
"Yes..."
by Stuart Fletcher January 6, 2005
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Team killer

<Noun> Computer gaming slang.

A person who, during an internet computer game, kills or damages their team mates intentionally in order to either help the other team (to which they may also be referred to as 'spies') or just to be a cock sucker and/or n00b.
May be abbreviated to TK'er.
CHIEF: "Master K is such a fucking TK'er."
MASTER K: "OMGWTF n00b STFU!!!11"
by Stuart Fletcher November 2, 2004
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Albion

<noun> poetic;

The island otherwise known as Britain.
"... and take me away, back to Albion forevermore..."
by Stuart Fletcher January 18, 2005
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Scally

<n> British slang
Anti-social youth who predominantly wears fake Burbury hats or baseball caps, stripey tops, shell suit bottoms (tucked into their socks) and brown Rockport shoes. Usually smokers, they find strength in numbers but as individuals are soft as steamy pig-shite. They shave their heads and often form 'Scooter patrols' when they are old enough to forge a license and steal a scooter.
Their main haunts are council estates, off-licences and public parks.
They walk like they own the place but have in fact probably stolen it.

See also chav, townie, twat, Knob-Head
"John Nailer is such a Scally."

"Here comes a Scally, let's kick the sore shit out of him."
by Stuart Fletcher November 2, 2004
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Fat arse

<noun>

1) Buttocks with a large fat deposit in them.

2) A fat person who acts like an arse.
1) "Bitch that is one fat arse!"

2) "You are a one fat arse, Tom. You ate all the pies and then threw up on the Pope."
by Stuart Fletcher February 14, 2005
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English Grammar

<noun>

The correct spellings and grammar of English words may only be found in an English dictionary, from England.

If you were to consult an American version of the English dictionary, you would find many perversions of our language within.
Why do the Americans insist that their spellings are correct just because their country is bigger than England? We spoke it first, we spelt it first, we wrote the first dictionary, the language is called English, when did 'Americanism' first enter our language? Who was the first fool to miss off the U in 'colour,' the S in 'maths,' the I in 'Aluminium' and the UE in 'analogue?'

It's so unfortunate...
by Stuart Fletcher February 22, 2005
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