scodder's definitions

sexy pig

A sexy pig is a pig in garters, fishnet stockings, and a lacy bra with eight cut-away cups.

Looks surprisingly hot on boars too.

Otis: I'm feelin' some yearnin's for your pig.

Festus: No surprise, bro. Look at the way it's tricked out. That's one sexy pig!

by scodder November 1, 2012

pinch hitter

A pinch hitter is someone who hits people while they're pinching one off.

Pete was quietly pinching a loaf when a wiffle bat came over the divider and hit him in the back of the head.

It was Ignacio the infamous pinch hitter, whose maniacal laughter echoed around the washroom as he ran away.

by scodder May 22, 2010

pedobear

Pedobear is a friendly bear who rides a moped.

He often gives rides to kids.

"Hi," said pedobear to little Jimmy, "I'm looking for a lost puppy. Would you like to get on my moped and help me find him?"

'Sure," said Jimmy, brushing back his blond curls, "do you have any candy?

by scodder June 7, 2010

master bait

To master bait means to gain mastery over the complex and intricate art of baiting a hook.

Timmy: Wow, you sure caught a lot of perch today!

Tommy: Yeah, it's cause I learned to master bait. Wanna see?

Timmy: Er... no thanks.

by scodder April 7, 2013

did you have sex with my barn owl

Did you have sex with my barn owl is what to ask when you find your barn owl at the neighbor's, dressed in gaudy lingerie and smelling of cheap booze and jizz.

A positive answer can wreck a barn owl's reputation.

Frontenac was obliged to ask, "Did you have sex with my barn owl?" when he found "Barney" at his neighbor's in a compromising position.

He was extremely relieved to hear the answer, "No, we just got to third base."

by scodder May 14, 2010

whore nuts

Whore nuts are how to tell for sure whether that delicious ho you're about to bang is a boy or a girl.

Edgar: You're looking a bit moody today.

Scott: I met this really hot ho last night and she said she was going to give me a freebie.

We were just getting going when I felt a gigantic pair of whore nuts.

Edgar: Wow, that's harsh, man!

by scodder November 15, 2012

can my cat watch?

"Can my cat watch?" is what not to say when you're on a first date and getting some action.

They had just made it to the bedroom, and Helena was taking her top off when Bryce asked, "Can my cat watch?"

Bryce slept alone with his cat that night.

by scodder June 29, 2010