one who keeps a optional partner on the side as a back up plan
comes from the movie Tommy Boy when Chris Farley tries to order chicken wings
"yea she turned me down, but I still have that Meat lovers pizza that works at the mall"
friend: "dude how did you get that girl to go out with you?"
person: "It didn't matter anyway I hooked up with this Meat lovers pizza at work last night"
A violent pseudo-sexual act in which one defecates on the blunt side of an axe, and proceeds to strike another person wit said poop-imbued tool.
Often considered a symbol of carnal-based pleasure, lincoln logging is recommended for any small group social situations including, but not limited to: game nights, group therapy, church, grocery store lines, family dinners, holiday parties, and small-scale orgies.
Verb- Lincoln Logging
"Gee golly, did that man just offer me a lincoln logger? I should have accepted his offer!"
"My oh my! I can't wait to get home and start lincoln logging my wife and kids!"