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1 definition by redwave@ymail

 
1.
The lazy and stupid person's easy answer to life, the universe and everything.

Ultimately, God tells everybody what to do, but there's a hierarchy of minions who are more than willing to tell others what to do on God's behalf.

This suits the dimwitted and idle, because there will always be somebody to do their thinking for them. When life gets difficult, you can just shrug your shoulders, satisfy yourself that it's all in God's bigger plan and shove another burger in your fat, stupid gob.

This also suits manipulative hypocrites who like to believe that their own world view is synonomous with fact and that they should have minions to do their bidding.

Unfortunately, whilst the most problematic religions all agree that there is only one God, they cannot agree on exactly which of them the one true god is. As they are all manipulative hypocrites, convinced of their own unquestionable self importance and absolute correctness, they feel justified in setting their minions upon one another, not caring about innocent bystanders caught in the crossfire - who want nothing to do with the whole ridiculous charade.
Religion through some ages...
6,000years ago
Desert Dweller 1: Why don't we trade with that other tribe? Surely that would be better for all of us?
Desert Dweller 2: Because we're chosen and they're not. We're God's people.
Desert Dweller 1: You've been listening to that looney, Moses again, haven't you?
Desert Dweller 2: Look, he came back with those stone tablets, that clearly God wrote for us.

Desert Dweller 1: Hmmm. And he was gone for, say the amount of time it takes a nutter to chisel ten commandments onto a bit of rock?
Desert Dweller 2: That's blasphemy. I must hoy rocks at your head...

1,500 years ago...
Desert Dweller 1: That Mohammed's getting a bit lairy.
Desert Dweller 2: God told him to hoy rocks at people's heads. If you don't do what God said, you'll be punished.
Desert Dweller 1: And what will God do?
Desert Dweller 2: He'll tell Mohammed to hoy a rock at your head, too....

1,000years ago...
Idiot 1: My God says this is my bit of barren desert.
Idiot 2: My God tells me it's mine.
Idiot 1: My God's better than your God.
Idiot 2: Is not.
Idiot 1: Is too.
(this continues for some time, until a large crowd gathers in support of both idiots and everybody begins hoying rocks at eachother)
by redwave@ymail August 27, 2011
9 13