Noun: A distinct political unit, for all intents
and purposes a country in its own right, located at the top north-east
corner of the island of Ireland, comprised of six of the nine counties
Also known as God's Own Country
or God's Chosen Six Counties
or the Province
, and most often shortened
in literature to Norn Iron
. A little country of a mere 1.5 million people, where job opportunities and social cohesion are so absent that most
of the population drinks heavily and hates
Vodka is cheap here, as is beer, thank god.
Northern Ireland contains everything that
is good about the island of Ireland. The Northern Irish people have a dark self-deprecating sense
of humour. We also beat England in 2005 in a football
match and we'll never let them forget it.
of people in Northern Ireland are inbred. Guinness tastes better up here, too.
Northern Ireland has many enemies in the wider
world, but mostly they are just haters
of Our Wee Country
Foreigner : Northern Ireland? Never
heard of it.
Me : It's fulla wankers mate. But it's home
"We're not Brazil, we're Northern Ireland"
(popular football song)
Northern Ireland. The home
of tatty bread
and brown lemonade.