old lang guy's definitions
This is the last survivor of one of many "Haven't heard anything like that since Grandma (Grandpa) ..." expressions that used to mean someone was overdramatizing their problems. Implied the person commented on was acting like a whiny old person. "Haven't heard anything like that since Granny got her tit caught in the wringer" was what you'd say when, e.g., a coworkers spent the morning complaining about someone having taken the last cup of coffee and not making a fresh pot.
"And everyone forgot to tell me that Awards Day is next week! Why doesn't anyone ever tell me? Doesn't anyone care ...." etc.
(whispered to friend) "Haven't heard anything like that since Granny caught her tit in a wringer."
(Alternatives that once were common) "Haven't heard anything like that since someone put a cherry bomb in Grandpa's truss."
"Haven't heard anything like that since Granny sat on the toilet plunger."
"Haven't heard anything like that since Grandpa got a turd stuck sideways."
(whispered to friend) "Haven't heard anything like that since Granny caught her tit in a wringer."
(Alternatives that once were common) "Haven't heard anything like that since someone put a cherry bomb in Grandpa's truss."
"Haven't heard anything like that since Granny sat on the toilet plunger."
"Haven't heard anything like that since Grandpa got a turd stuck sideways."
by old lang guy September 18, 2008
Get the tit in a wringer mug.1: Double useless, something with no point at all. Comes off of "tits on" any male mammal, since males don't nurse the young; chickens of course don't nurse their young at all, so tits would be especially useless on a rooster.
2: derogatory for tiny or very small breasts
2: derogatory for tiny or very small breasts
He's not even tits on a boar, at best he's tits on a rooster.
So we had it about worked out when Tits on a Rooster finally showed up, and it all had to have his input.
She's got about the same tits God gave a rooster.
So we had it about worked out when Tits on a Rooster finally showed up, and it all had to have his input.
She's got about the same tits God gave a rooster.
by old lang guy October 29, 2006
Get the tits on a rooster mug.Teacher slang for middle school girls who dress trampy, claim more sexual experience than they really have, and loudly discuss everyone else's clothing, popularity, etc.; mini-sluts tend to intimidate boys their own age but are laughed at by anyone older than they are, especially the high school boys they try to attract. They usually know everything you can learn in a chatroom or by watching television, and nothing else. Noted for their diva-ish tantrums and rigid enforcement of whatever they think the social rules should be.
Teacher 1: Did you have some trouble with that mini-slut Kelly at lunch?
Teacher 2: Yeah, she announced that Wendy dressed like a fucktard virgin and slapped her, because Wendy was wearing a skirt and sweater instead of a belly shirt and pube jeans. Then all the other mini-sluts jumped on Wendy. I think they just wanted to get sent home during high school lunch hour so they could walk by the high school.
Teacher 2: Yeah, she announced that Wendy dressed like a fucktard virgin and slapped her, because Wendy was wearing a skirt and sweater instead of a belly shirt and pube jeans. Then all the other mini-sluts jumped on Wendy. I think they just wanted to get sent home during high school lunch hour so they could walk by the high school.
by old lang guy September 17, 2008
Get the mini-slut mug.A song line that seems to indicate ignorance, sloppiness, or lack of education on the part of the songwriter.
According to urban legend, the line in Green Day's "Good Riddance (The Time of Your Life)" "a fork stuck in the road" says that the fork is "stuck" rather than just "in the road" because of the mistaken idea that people somewhere back in "olden days" used to stick dinner forks into the road when they changed directions; the claim is often made that one or another member of Green Day told such a story during an interview, but if so there doesn't seem to be any such interview online. It really doesn't sound like them; they're a pretty bright bunch of people.
According to urban legend, the line in Green Day's "Good Riddance (The Time of Your Life)" "a fork stuck in the road" says that the fork is "stuck" rather than just "in the road" because of the mistaken idea that people somewhere back in "olden days" used to stick dinner forks into the road when they changed directions; the claim is often made that one or another member of Green Day told such a story during an interview, but if so there doesn't seem to be any such interview online. It really doesn't sound like them; they're a pretty bright bunch of people.
Alanis Morisette's "Ironic" is a fork stuck in the road; nothing she describes in the song is ironic.
"Hey, that doesn't mean what he thinks it means!"
"Relax, dude, at least it rhymes, and it's just a fork stuck in the road!"
Every time you hear the rolling thunder, you don't need to run, because the lightning already struck and you're still here to hear it.
"Hey, that doesn't mean what he thinks it means!"
"Relax, dude, at least it rhymes, and it's just a fork stuck in the road!"
Every time you hear the rolling thunder, you don't need to run, because the lightning already struck and you're still here to hear it.
by old lang guy September 30, 2006
Get the fork stuck in the road mug.When used ironically, used by young artists (teens-30) to refer to work that will convince 30-40 year old money people that it will appeal to young people; not necessarily what the young artist or his/her young audience wants, but what the money people feel they should want.
"How's the mural on the coffeehouse wall coming?"
"The backer drove in from the suburbs and said it wasn't hip enough, so now I've got to put in a bunch of oldstyle stuff so he'll think it'll appeal to young people."
The band is young, intellectual, and hip=a 40-year-old rock critic can't fit into their jeans, but gets their inside jokes, and would have loved them when he was twenty.
Publisher (who is fifty) to a roomful of 20 year old writers and editors: we've got to remake the mag into something hip that will appeal to 20 somethings. Writer (after he goes): So is hip the new lame? Editor: No, hip is what we'd like if we liked what he'd like us to like.
"The backer drove in from the suburbs and said it wasn't hip enough, so now I've got to put in a bunch of oldstyle stuff so he'll think it'll appeal to young people."
The band is young, intellectual, and hip=a 40-year-old rock critic can't fit into their jeans, but gets their inside jokes, and would have loved them when he was twenty.
Publisher (who is fifty) to a roomful of 20 year old writers and editors: we've got to remake the mag into something hip that will appeal to 20 somethings. Writer (after he goes): So is hip the new lame? Editor: No, hip is what we'd like if we liked what he'd like us to like.
by old lang guy August 27, 2010
Get the hip mug.Slang among political ops for "I am looking for dirt on your candidate." May or may not be connected to the classic line from The Godfather: "Clemenza sleeps with the fish." Meaning he's been whacked, per orders. So "Fishing for your Goombas," maybe, started out meaning "looking for the bodies in your candidate's background." (Classically such bodies would be a live boy or a dead girl).
"Hey, what's this bullshit with a guy with a camera in the parking lot at four in the morning?"
"I am fishing for your Goombas, asshole. If your boy can't keep it zipped, the people got a right to know."
"I am fishing for your Goombas, asshole. If your boy can't keep it zipped, the people got a right to know."
by old lang guy October 14, 2006
Get the I am fishing for your Goombas mug.The rule that if you listen very seriously and intently, with a deeply caring expression, to anyone until 4:30 a.m., they then must have sex with you. Sometimes a verb as well. Comes from the original, good version of Bedazzled, with Peter Cook (as the devil) and Dudley Moore (as the guy being tempted).
"Have you thought of just applying the rule of half past four?"
"What is it?"
"If you can stay wide awake and gaze at her thinking 'You are fascinating,' the whole time she talks, for everything she says, no matter how pointless and no matter how stupid, till half past four in the morning, you're in." (Not an exact quote)
I wanted her so bad that one night when she was drunk and dumping all this self pity, I kept telling her what an interesting person she was, until I finally half past foured my way into her pants.
"What is it?"
"If you can stay wide awake and gaze at her thinking 'You are fascinating,' the whole time she talks, for everything she says, no matter how pointless and no matter how stupid, till half past four in the morning, you're in." (Not an exact quote)
I wanted her so bad that one night when she was drunk and dumping all this self pity, I kept telling her what an interesting person she was, until I finally half past foured my way into her pants.
by old lang guy August 31, 2007
Get the rule of half past four mug.