1 definition by mushytoast

Top Definition
1) Attempting to act detached and “cool” in a way taught to the kids by MTV-affiliated celebrities.

2) A condition often seen among adolescent humans. It typically arises when a individual learns to perceive herself in a objective and rational third-person perspective, but due to her inexperience, fails to appreciate the irony of what existentialist philosophers have coined "The Absurd". The absurd human condition; the understanding of how our lives, on a cosmic scale, are futile and unimportant struggles, yet how we are unable free ourselves from treating our lives with the greatest concern.

Failing to appreciate the irony of her absurd existence, the aspiring teenage cynic then becomes obsessed with damasking the meaningfulness of her own life and the lives of others. This, she believes, will help her reach a more fundamental understanding of something which is somehow more significant and objective than that of her present life. For some people extremely prone to melodrama the condition ends in suicide.

Because the individual believes in the "truth" brought on by stripping away sentimental values culture have taught us to attach to the world, she is often perceived outwardly as cynical. This condition however should not be associated with philosophical cynicism or the kind of cynicism advocated by the likes of (the myth of) Aesop, Oscar Wilde or Dr. Samuel Johnson. The world will often treat the teenage cynic with disdain, confusing her condition with depression or apathy. Trying to solve the problem by offering entertainment of various types, the problem may intensify as the teenage cynic often will be unable to appreciate the entertainment offered, instead deeming it superficial.
Statements someone affected by teenage cynicism would typically say:

Teenage cynic 1: To me it's depressing to think about the fact that life is fundamentally without objective meaning and that one day we will all die (and the universe will end).

Teenage cynic 2: Men running around on a field, competing against each other, trying to kick a ball made out of dead skin in opposite directions. Soccer is for retards.
by mushytoast October 14, 2008

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