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12 definitions by jfkelley

 
1.
A play on the common term "user-friendly", a user-hostile design is one that is, deliberately or accidentally, difficult or cumbersome for the intended user.

Often used derisively to describe the competition.
We intend to improve upon the user-hostile design of your existing sales tool.

Some say that the user-hostile design of the original QWERTY keyboard was an intentional effort to slow typists down so as not to allow them to jam the mechanical parts.
by jfkelley June 16, 2009
 
2.
noun: The unpleasant surprise you get when you choose a seemingly harmless emoticon from the static image palette only to see it animate into something tasteless after you've chosen it and sent it.

Alternate:
noun: An emoticon that looks harmless when viewed in the static image palette, but provides a nasty surprise when you select it and send it by animating into something tasteless.
Imagine my emoticonsternation when that smiley face I sent to my mom turned out to be a bloody horrorshow.

I got fired when I accidentally sent my boss an emoticonsternation.
by jfkelley June 15, 2009
 
3.
A practitioner of Agile Software Development who is fanatical about hewing to the Agile Manifesto.

Coined by J.F. Kelley for a Keynote Address given to the World Usability Day conference in Dayton, OH, November 2007.

(But was possibly also in use prior to that.)
Hey, if they can call their mission statement a "manifesto", I can call them "Agilistas"!
by jfkelley September 08, 2010
 
4.
A stand-alone software module that can be slapped onto an existing application to enhance it's function or performance.

This is typically a JavaScript file that can be linked in a vanilla web page to add -- at load time -- Rich Internet Application (RIA) behaviors to the existing UI controls.

A "pefect" barnacle would be effective without any other changes to the web page code (but would allow incremental additions of attributes to customize the behavior).
I found a smart-table barnacle script we can stick on our web page to make those tables sortable and filterable.

I wrote a calendar barnacle that automatically converts any input box with class="date" to a calendar picker field.
by jfkelley June 16, 2009
 
5.
A miniature rendering of a website, complete with representative tabs, navigation features, text blocks, etc., used to reflect, in real time, dynamic changes to style.
As you drag your cursor across the color wheel to change background colors, notice the effects that will have on your website by watching the webunculus.
by jfkelley June 11, 2009
 
6.
A device you must plug into your computer to verify that you bought -- and are entitled to operate -- an over-priced and under-performing software application.
I found and plugged in the boondongle, but the software application turned out to be useless.
by jfkelley May 01, 2009
 
7.
A high-severity defect that leaves the system in a very bad state. (noun)

Etymology: a combination of "defect" and the adjective form of a common 4-letter slang word derived from the latin fvccant which, in common parlance means to have been cheated.

Alternate definition: an unlikely condition of having regained ones virginity (but this would probably require a homophonic spelling).
I logged two defects on the layout and a defuct about the server crash.
by jfkelley June 19, 2009