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Definitions by jethrojones

Mcdonalds Mclipo Meal

What the heck? Special lipo ports are installed at the tables to suck out the fat from your fat order you just ate. Blue for guys. Pink for girls. Say you order 3 Super size meals. You eat two and connect the free screw in port into your belly button. As you eat the machine turns on sucking out your meals. Calories 0. You then take the other meal and heat it up later. Everybody wins! McDonalds sells more and you control your weight by ordering the McDonalds Mclipo Meal. The fat is then repurposed and added to the fryer. You feel so awesome you order some cookies to go.
Jadu: I simply love McDonalds McLipo Meal.
Vrin: Me too. I lost 80 lbs. on this diet.
Jadu: I'm an addict now.
Vrin: McDonalds really cares about us minions.
Jadu: I'm rewriting my will so everything will go to Mickey D's.
Vrin: Already did that.
Mcdonalds Mclipo Meal by jethrojones November 22, 2020
Jadu: Look at that girl's tits. They are gigantic. I can only imagine how they must look like lazily swaying back and forth when she's doing yoga braless in the dog pose. The girls in the class call them hangers.
Vrin: They are hangers. I'm in the class. I can't concentrate when she's there.
hangers by jethrojones November 14, 2020

cell phone nipple 

Many companies are coming out with new phones with a new cell phone nipple on the back to help addicts calm down

so they can function better. It looks like the real thing. Equal opportunity nipple. Good for any and all users.
Dude: "Look at Brandy." "She's at it again."

Jadu: "Yeah man, she just can't get enough." "She loves her new cell phone nipple feature."

Dude: "What's that?" Its a nipple on the back of her phone so she can nurse." "She seems to prefer it over food."

Jadu: "She's been on it now for over an hour." "Best to just leave alone."
Dude: "Yeah you're right." "She's pretty much zoned out." "Maybe I'll leave her a bag of chips."
Jadu: "That's thoughtful man."
Dude: "Thanks bro."

hamburger person 

People that just can't seem to ever get it right. They are hamburger. Ergo, the birth of a hamburger person.
Jadu: I think Don is a hamburger person.
Vrin: What does that mean?
Jadu: Don is clearly out to lunch.
Vrin: What does that mean?
Jadu: I asked Don if he was a hamburger person and he wasn't sure what I meant by that. Later, Don was moved to the hamburger person unit.
hamburger person by jethrojones March 22, 2019

Trump hair 

Butt hair that is brought up the back and onto the head.
Vrin: Did you see Trump today?
Jadu: His Trump hair had some dingleberries in it.
Vrin: That's disgusting.
Jadu: He likes a little bling.
Trump hair by jethrojones September 20, 2015

McBrain Dead 

People who after constantly eating McDonalds for 10 or more years, look like and smell like McDonalds product. Their parents and grandparents let them graze there when they could first take solid food. They are Mcbrain Dead. They cry uncontrollably when they see vegetables.
Vrin: Look at that 400 lb. teen eating yet another happy Meal.
Jadu: That's their 3rd one already!!! The teen's McBrain Dead parents work there and dine al fresco later in the Mcdumpster out back.
McBrain Dead by jethrojones December 5, 2012

total hamburger 

When someone is deeply fried, well done past burnt and has slid quietly into the zone. This special soul has checked out. They can breathe and maybe burp a bit, little more though. They are on the other side of the counter now. Total hamburger.
Vrin: "Man you are fucked up dude." "You've ceased being human."
Jadu: "I know." (Spoken slowly.)
Vrin: "You resemble landfill now."
Jadu: "I know." (Spoken very slowly.)
Vrin: "Dude, you are fucking hamburger." "Like total hamburger."
Jadu: "I know." (Barely audible.)
Vrin: "Dude, do you want a donut or a beer?"
Jadu: "I know." (No audio now.)
total hamburger by jethrojones September 2, 2012