a cross between a schlong (an abnormally large penis) and a chode (a penis that is wider than it is long)
thus meaning that a schlode is a amazingly large meat hammer than is completely useless for anything sexual, but can be used to hit someone over the head with and hurt them, alot.
gemma: so how did it go with tom last night?
georgette: not good! he had a total schlode!
adam: woah henry what happened to your face!
henry: tom got mad and hit me with his schlode, fucking asshole