h.s. willsy's definitions
Apple fanboys who know everything about the company from the first line of code on the first Macintosh's operating system to the colour of the inner walls of Steve Job's small intestine
"OMG, I cannot, CANNOT, beliiiiiieve that you still don't have an iPod yet."
"I kind of like my mp3 player dude. I can carry a spare battery around with me in case it runs out and you can't do that with an iPod right?"
"OMG, OMG! Do you know anything about lithium-ion batteries or are you just trying to be cool? Apple bashing is so cool now right? Just get a fucking iPod and an iPhone like uuuuurverybody else."
"Look, iSpod, it's not cute anymore. I'm sick of you sticking your iPhone in my face and showing me some lame app that was seemingly designed by a twelve year old retarded kid. I'm sick of you holding up your iPad in the middle of town and shouting about how cool augmented reality is whilst running about like a fairy. And I'm sick of the sound leak from your shitty, white Apple brand head phones. So. Just. FUCK! OFF!!!!"
"OMG, like whatever."
*KILLS*
"I kind of like my mp3 player dude. I can carry a spare battery around with me in case it runs out and you can't do that with an iPod right?"
"OMG, OMG! Do you know anything about lithium-ion batteries or are you just trying to be cool? Apple bashing is so cool now right? Just get a fucking iPod and an iPhone like uuuuurverybody else."
"Look, iSpod, it's not cute anymore. I'm sick of you sticking your iPhone in my face and showing me some lame app that was seemingly designed by a twelve year old retarded kid. I'm sick of you holding up your iPad in the middle of town and shouting about how cool augmented reality is whilst running about like a fairy. And I'm sick of the sound leak from your shitty, white Apple brand head phones. So. Just. FUCK! OFF!!!!"
"OMG, like whatever."
*KILLS*
by H.S. Willsy August 27, 2011
Get the iSpodmug. "Ten points if you hit any sea bumps!"
"That's sick Ted."
"Yeah...I gues you're right...I've just not been the same since I got ill and turned that bunga bunga orgy into a scat fest...The horror. The horror."
"That's sick Ted."
"Yeah...I gues you're right...I've just not been the same since I got ill and turned that bunga bunga orgy into a scat fest...The horror. The horror."
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
Get the Sea Bumpsmug. 1) To find oneself in a public toilet that is lacking a door lock, a toilet seat or a loo roll
2) Any situation in which poo becomes a visible nuisance
2) Any situation in which poo becomes a visible nuisance
1) "Aww man. there's no toilet paper up in this smelly joint. What a shitemare."
"I've got paper for you buddy, in return for a little something something that is."
"Ted? Is that you?"
"It was always me Bill, it was always me."
2) The Indian Commonwealth Games
"I've got paper for you buddy, in return for a little something something that is."
"Ted? Is that you?"
"It was always me Bill, it was always me."
2) The Indian Commonwealth Games
by H.S. Willsy August 23, 2011
Get the Shitemaremug. "Yish, looking at that stravaiging bag head over there."
"How about I stravaig over there and rub my open wound on you?"
"Easy stravaiger, there's no need to get shirty, I was just making a comment on the aimlessness your existence."
"Tis true I suppose. Any chance of some money?"
"You give oral sex?"
"Certainly sir."
"Buzzing cha, buzzing."
"How about I stravaig over there and rub my open wound on you?"
"Easy stravaiger, there's no need to get shirty, I was just making a comment on the aimlessness your existence."
"Tis true I suppose. Any chance of some money?"
"You give oral sex?"
"Certainly sir."
"Buzzing cha, buzzing."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
Get the Stravaigmug. When pregnant women eat junk food with no positive nutritional qualities and claim that it's a craving, they're using the pregnancy craving shield.
"Could you go out and get me another two bags of chips? And a deep fried pizza slice?"
"Really?"
"I'M CRAVING IT!"
"Jesus, put the pregnancy craving shield down already. I'll get it for you. Just stop looking at me like I'm a man-sized chicken leg."
"Really?"
"I'M CRAVING IT!"
"Jesus, put the pregnancy craving shield down already. I'll get it for you. Just stop looking at me like I'm a man-sized chicken leg."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
Get the The Pregnancy Craving Shieldmug. When someone who is usually terrible with the ladies gets drunk and inexplicably starts pulling hot girls, they are Miami Beached.
"Is that girl still here?"
"Yeah."
"How the fuck did you pull her?"
"Don't know."
"You in shock or something?"
"Most likely."
"Shit, you were well Miami Beached."
"Indubitably."
"Yeah."
"How the fuck did you pull her?"
"Don't know."
"You in shock or something?"
"Most likely."
"Shit, you were well Miami Beached."
"Indubitably."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
Get the Miami Beachedmug. A type of live action gambling that can be undertaken in Thailand. First of all the gambler must select three Thai hookers and take them back to his room. The gambler then asks them to reveal their genitals, one by one. Like with a one armed bandit (English word for slot machine), the way to win is to get three cherries in a row. Any less than three cherries and you're BUST
"I wish they had some one armed bandit machines out here."
"We could just play one eyed bandit?"
"Hmm, yeah. Or Thai roulette maybe?"
"Either or man, I just need to unload quickly before my balls get any heavier. I feel like I'm lugging around a couple of coconuts in a 50g peanut bag."
"We could just play one eyed bandit?"
"Hmm, yeah. Or Thai roulette maybe?"
"Either or man, I just need to unload quickly before my balls get any heavier. I feel like I'm lugging around a couple of coconuts in a 50g peanut bag."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
Get the One Eyed Banditmug.