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h.s. willsy's definitions

Dim Toning

Setting your favourite song as your ring tone and then, after months of hearing it over and over again through your phone's bass-hating speakers, growing to hate it through too much repetition
"Isn't this your favourite song?"

"No, I can't stand it anymore. I set it as my ring tone and after four months of hearing just the chorus I cracked."

"Gutted. That's some pretty dim toning on your part."

"Yeah."

"What have you got as your ring tone now?"

"Why are we talking about ring tones?"

"We must just be losers."

"Bastard."
by H.S. Willsy August 27, 2011
mugGet the Dim Toningmug.

Giger Wanker

A Giger Wanker is someone who straps themselves to a ceiling whilst wearing a gas mask and then proceeds to masturbate to a slide show of H.R. Giger paintings. Traditionally they will mutter, "this is normal, this is normal," to themselves until they cum when they will shout, "take that sexual perversion!"
"Why is every guy I meet gay, married or a Giger Wanker?"
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
mugGet the Giger Wankermug.

Stravaig

Old Scottish, Northern English and Irish word.

Means to wander about aimlessly
"Yish, looking at that stravaiging bag head over there."

"How about I stravaig over there and rub my open wound on you?"

"Easy stravaiger, there's no need to get shirty, I was just making a comment on the aimlessness your existence."

"Tis true I suppose. Any chance of some money?"

"You give oral sex?"

"Certainly sir."

"Buzzing cha, buzzing."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
mugGet the Stravaigmug.

Radio Foured

When someone is completely sober and doing something dull whilst all their friend are out partying, they are radio foured.
"Where were you last night?"

"Radio foured."

"Doing what?"

"I had to go to my girlfriend's grandma's ninety fifth birthday party. What did you get up to?"

"We were snorting comedown-free drugs off naked porn stars for a bit and then we got kebabs."

*SIGHS*
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
mugGet the Radio Fouredmug.

Kurt Cobrained

When someone gets wasted to the point that there brains are literally no longer in their skull, they are Kurt Cobrained.
"Ah, fuck! This kid on the sofa's Kurt Cobrained man!"

"What?"

"His brains are all external to his skull and shit!"

"Ahhh! Fuck! Put a lamp shade over his head or something!"

"Ahhh! Okay, there we go. Now what?"

"Now we warm these Pot Noodles up."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
mugGet the Kurt Cobrainedmug.

Drunk Reset

A vomit that restores you to an earlier save point of soberness
"I don't feel too bad now but I don't remember anything between here and the club."

"Yeah, you hit the drunk reset on the way back."

"Oh, that's good."

"Not really dude, you were french kissing your girlfriend's brother when it happened."

"Yish, not again."
by H.S. Willsy August 23, 2011
mugGet the Drunk Resetmug.

Shitemare

1) To find oneself in a public toilet that is lacking a door lock, a toilet seat or a loo roll

2) Any situation in which poo becomes a visible nuisance
1) "Aww man. there's no toilet paper up in this smelly joint. What a shitemare."

"I've got paper for you buddy, in return for a little something something that is."

"Ted? Is that you?"

"It was always me Bill, it was always me."

2) The Indian Commonwealth Games
by H.S. Willsy August 23, 2011
mugGet the Shitemaremug.

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