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16 definitions by furry trout

 
8.
A person who exemplifies the finer qualities of Milton Waddams from Office Space, including distracted thinking, disheveled appearance, complete lack of self confidence, inappropriate mumbling or talking to oneself, and an obsessive compulsion to only focus on one item (such as a red stapler or an outgoing wire process) regardless of what else is going on around him/her. Given a small amount of power or control, this person tends to go completely Napoleonic, and is typically just dumb enough to be dangerous.
This new guy Paul is a complete Waddamite. First he shows up wearing a tie that ends four inches above the belt; then he begins really distracting cavitations in his chair, all while mumbling to himself and awkwardly typing on his laptop as we’re trying to explain a very simple process that he completely misunderstands no matter how simple we make it. I can’t believe that anyone would put this guy in charge of a hamburger, never mind an examination.
by Furry Trout May 12, 2010
 
9.
Battle Of The Afternoon Lady ‘Staches

When you are in a situation where there are two or more women in close proximity to you, and at least two of them are sporting emerging moustaches
Dude, you should have been in my 3pm meeting. It was completely BOTALS!!! Bridgette had Rita by a full Billie Dee Williams. Two more hours, and she’d have been mistaken for Rollie Fingers!!!!
by Furry Trout May 06, 2010
 
10.
Someone who, in a conversation, can’t stop using adjectives to describe something, even after the sentence has gone grammatically awry
Red Fraggle is such an overdescriber. Today she was on the phone with a client and actually said “it's still kinda the same activity a little bit like this kind of” when she was comparing today’s activity to previous activity.
by Furry Trout May 12, 2010
 
11.
A person who is able to use a variety of technical terms to ultimately say nothing meaningful, but somehow still manages to satisfactorily answer questions from senior management, all while sipping a Venti, sugar-free, non-fat, vanilla soy, double shot, decaf, no foam, extra hot, Peppermint White Chocolate Peppermint Mocha with light whip, upside-down, 1 pump of peppermint, 1 and 3/8 pumps vanilla, heavy whip-cream, 3 ice cubes, 1/4 teaspoon Nutmeg sprinkled on top, with green sprinkles, light cinnamon dusted on, stirred, with no lid, double cupped, and a straw
Gary is the ultimate jargonista. He was able to deflect each of Claire's questions with a bunch of mis-used and non-sensical technical terms without spilling his latest barista creation.
by Furry Trout August 11, 2011
 
12.
A public toilet that someone has left completely shrouded in toilet paper
I went into the men’s room this afternoon and the back stall contained a zombie bowl. There was so much paper draped around the thing, I was afraid whatever lay beneath might re-animate if disturbed.
by Furry Trout June 12, 2012
 
13.
Successfully botching or combining two cliché’s into one new phrase that makes no sense, but still allows the listener to understand the intended platitude.
Jeffrey coined another classic amalgamadage today. We were talking about trying to minimize the aggravation our customer was experiencing, and he blurts out, “Spite my nose of the very hand that feeds us.” It was an incredible blend of “Cut off your nose despite your face” and “Bite the hand that feeds you.” I was rendered speechless, yet still managed to take copious notes.
by Furry Trout July 12, 2011
 
14.
Someone who has a purported level of subject matter expertise, yet consistently shies away from any circumstance when that expertise may be called into question for fear that the knowledge castle of sand will be revealed.
Boy Wonder just had another Jefflon moment. He was asked to speak about the recent OCIE release and just weaseled his way off the agenda again.
by Furry Trout September 27, 2013