15 definitions by filthy pirate hooker

Pirate Cumsquat

When a girl is squatting down giving a guy a blow job, and right before he cums, she loses her balance, falls off, and gets squirted in the eye on as she falls backwards!

That poor drunk girl was blowing me in the bathroom but had no idea she was in for a pirate cumsquat!

by filthy pirate hooker June 14, 2011

Clam Tuck

a labial rejuvenation

That hoe's so used up, she had to get a clam tuck to keep her pussy from dragging on the ground!

by filthy pirate hooker January 30, 2010

Mobile Upload

When you get road head by an old woman with no teeth while driving a Rascal down the street

My grandpa gets around so much better with his Rascal. He gets mobile uploads all the time now!

by filthy pirate hooker December 24, 2009

abominable snowjob

When a girl gives you a blowjob, spits it in her hand, then smacks you across the face and punches you in the nuts

I was enjoying my blowjob until my girlfriend pulled an abominable snowjob on me!

by filthy pirate hooker October 21, 2014

PB&J

When you take a shit, smear it all over your dick, then have sex with a girl while she's on her period.

My girlfriend lets me give her a PB&J when it's "crime scene week!"

by filthy pirate hooker August 24, 2011

Ahmish Blowjob

When you cut a hole in a sheet, stick your dick through it and have a girl give you a blowjob without ever having to look at her

That girl was kind of a fattie, but I didn't want to waste some good wood, and I never turn down an Ahmish Blowjob

by filthy pirate hooker March 5, 2011

Fancy Tucker

A chick with a dick

That chick was hot but turns out she was just a fancy tucker!

by filthy pirate hooker January 16, 2010