Someone who realizes they are gay, lesbian, bisexual, genderqueer, trans, or otherwise queer later in life or after making major life decisions like entering a straight marriage.
Sometimes the person noticed they might be GLBTQ early on, but didn't realize it warranted real consideration. Other times the realization seems to come out of the blue.
QueerL can also be used to describe someone who meets the above definition, or to describe their life situation.
Usually queerLs start a path of self-discovery which sometimes includes an affair, open, or poly relationship, and often results in eventually coming out of the closet and becoming a part of the larger queer community. Other queerLs chose to just keep the knowledge of their sexuality to themselves indefinitely. QueerLs are often isolated, many have never met (or realized they knew) another GLBTQ person.
QueerL people often face more complex issues in their personal life as a result of coming out later in life than people who come out earlier in life.
Jane is queerL. She was married to a man for 25 years and then realized she was actually a lesbian when she met Sue!