A sexist phrase that a male says to a female when he's drunk and/or hungry.
*GIRL TALKING TO FRIEND*
Girl: My boyfriend keeps yelling at me, "MAKE ME A SANDWICH, BITCH!" He's being sexist and now I need a good comeback to say to him.. ANY SUGGESTIONS?
Guy friend: Well, you better comeback with a god damn sandwich.
Referring to The Rules of the Internet. Possibly the most important rules of them all.
Rule 29 states: In the internet all girls are men and all kids are undercover FBI agents.
Rule 30 states: There are no girls on the internet.
Very useful rules to know while using online chat rooms.
normal teenager: r u a girl or guy?
girl(not): im a gurl.. cant u tell? <3
normal teenager: bitch step off i know rules 29 & 30
strange man: So you're 7, eh?
little boy(not): yes, why?
strange man: rly? im 8. do you want to meet in real life sometime??
little boy(not): Sir, this is FBI agent Michael Scarn, I hereby place you under arrest. Anything you say can and will be used against you.
strange man: DAMN. I wish I'd remembered rules 29 & 30.
An event that scars normal, law-abiding people for the rest of their lives.
A wide variety of things can be described as fucked up shit, some of which are listed below.
2 girls 1 cup
hXc internet porn
watching the polar express 50+ times
seeing fat people have sex
seeing your grandparents have sex
seeing any old people have sex
seeing your parents have sex
seeing your siblings have sex (even if it's not incest)
watching somebody commit suicide
using bodies as sandbags (you know... war..)
watching people jump out of burning buildings (9/11)
watching animal cruelty videos
putrid sex object
2 guys 1 horse
holy fucking shit man.. there's a lot of fucked up shit out there..
I'm a lucky guy, I got a lot going for me. I'm healthy, I'm relatively young, I'm white, which, thank god for that shit, boy. That is a HUGE step up. Oh, god, i love being white, I really do. Seriously, if you're not white, you're missing out.
And let me be clear about it by the way. I'm not saying that white people are better. I'm saying that being white, is clearly better..
Here's how great it is to be white... I could get in a time machine, and go to any time, and it would be fucking AWESOME when I get there. That is exclusively a white privilege. Black people can't fuck with time machines.. A black guy with a time machine is like, "Hey.. anything before 1980, no thank you, I don't wanna go."
I could go to any time.. I could go to the year 2, I don't even know what's happening then.. But i know when i get there, "Welcome we have a table right here for you sir"
I could go to any time.. In the past, I don't wanna go to the future and find out what happens to white people, because, we're gonna pay hard for this shit, you gotta know that. We're not just gonna fall from #1 to 2... They're gonna hold us down and fuck us in the ass forever. And we totally deserve it, but for now... WEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
You can't even hurt my feelings. What can you really call a white man that really digs deep?
"Aww, ruined my day.. Bringin me back to owning land.. and people. What a drag."
P.S. I'm not racist
Being white, well.. fuck, this shit is thoroughly good.
If you're white and don't admit that it's great, you're an asshole.