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2 definitions by d3athp3nguin

 
1.
1. An umbrella term used in many Telecom companies that covers the process of adding a new service or expanding an existing service.

2. A catchy term that clueless sales guys use to refer to the deployment of complicated services when talking with their even-more-clueless customers. Engineers sometimes use this term will sales guys and customers as well, to avoid the confusion caused by explaining the technical nature of their work.
Example 1

You: "I ordered this internet circuit three months ago; where the hell is it?"
Internet Service Provider: "Oh, it appears there was an error in the provisioning process and that circuit was dropped to Alabama instead of New York.
You: "FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU..."

Example 2

Customer: "When is our internets and servers and things going to be up and running?
Sales douche: "Well sir, our engineers are almost done provisioning these items for you. Isn't that right, engineer?"
Engineer: "FML... Yes, I will be 'provisioning' your entire IT infrastructure by the end of the week, like our sales guy promised on my behalf."
Customer: "That word sounded fancy and not too technical! I feel better now."
by d3athp3nguin July 11, 2011
 
2.
Coordinators are either useful or useless, and there are two types:

1. In business, the PROJECT COORDINATOR is used by management to patch over some type of failing that they encounter in their processes. It is easier for them to simply hire someone with "organizational skills" and charge them with the responsibility of "making sure things get done."

Usually their job devolves into mindless nagging and tedious task management. Their nagging also serves to lower worker morale over time, leading to higher employee attrition and fighting in the workplace.

2. In event planning, EVENT COORDINATORS are often extremely necessary, and function as the "glue" that holds an event or project together. They are most necessary in events like concerts or mass protests, where a large number of guests must rely on some amount of structure to be in place for their activities.

Paradoxically, events that appear to be free-form or anarchistic often require the most coordinating work behind the scenes, because the guests expect everything to "just work" for them when they get there. Behind every Burning Man or Bonaroo, there is usually an army of unappreciated, frazzled coordinators working around the clock to make sure that the event goes off without a hitch.
Example 1:

Sysadmin 1- "Did you hear about the new Project Coordinator that management hired?"
Sysadmin 2- "Yea, all he does is send people nagging emails and CC's the boss in all of them, so it looks like he is being productive."
Sysadmin 1- "Screw this man, I'm looking for another job."

Example 2:

Hippie- "Burning Man is awesome! It's proof that thousands of people can just get together and do drugs and it all just works out! Yaay anarchism!"
Event Coordinator- "If you hadn't shared some of that weed with me, I'd be stabbing you in the face right now..."
by d3athp3nguin July 11, 2011