cut the cards's definitions

card trick

When you run a playing card through your crack then give somebody the business with it.

Greg: I gave my girlfriend the card trick when she fell asleep last night. She was mad, it woke her up out of a dead sleep when I waved it under her nose. She deserved it though.

by cut the cards August 3, 2022

Lume ass

That new deodorant for the little lady.

Rhonda: Feeling good tonight after riding the ATV all day in 90 weather.

Phil: What you sayin ?

Rhonda: Feelin frisky.

Phil: I'm sure you will just put on some of that Lume again.
Rhonda: Are you saying I have Lume ass ?

by cut the cards January 13, 2023

hat in the ring

Get in on a huge blowout family argument

Roger: Boy, that sure was uncomfortable at the holiday gathering yesterday.

Harvey: Not sure what you mean ?

Roger: Lots of conversations and perceived slights henceforth to cry and whine about.

Harvey: Sorry, I had to take a leak every time I heard one start, or get more food.

Roger: Good move. You don't have to throw your hat in the ring then.
Harvey: I block numbers after these get together's for a while. It's great.

by cut the cards March 12, 2023

take your breath away

A chick with really bad breath that is beautiful.

Roger: See that gal across the room ?

Harvey: Yes, she takes my breath away.

Roger: You got that right. She will take your breath away. I hired her to peel wallpaper in my bathroom with it.

by cut the cards February 23, 2023

slackerdrive

Drive your man all around town and pay for the car, gas, insurance, etc. especially when out of henny and weed.

Julie: Where to next baby ?

De'Vontleroy: I tolds you !
Julie: Sorry. Want to swing through Popeyes or KFC too as I slackerdrive ?

by cut the cards December 27, 2022

reeking around the Christmas tree

Relatives that wear old reeking sweaters that smell like cigarettes.

Mabel: How do you like my vintage Christmas sweater I have not washed for decades ?

Junior: It's nice.

Mabel: I am taking a smoke break I will be right back. We will be reeking around the Christmas tree soon.
Junior: Thanks for the warning.

by cut the cards December 19, 2022

silver stinker

Someone you met at silver sneakers workout class.

Roger: I went to the spin class at silver sneakers.

Carl: How was it ?

Roger: I met this nice looking older woman.

Carl: How did that go ?

Roger: She turned out to be a silver stinker once we went to her place.

by cut the cards January 7, 2023