cut the cards's definitions

convertible

That one guy with a toupee everyone knows is a toupee but thinks no one else knows

Roger: Man, we sure had a good time at the club.

Harvey: Yes. Did you see the convertible ?

Roger: Yes. He didn't think I saw him take out the garbage in the morning with it all the way removed.

by cut the cards March 8, 2023

take your breath away

A chick with really bad breath that is beautiful.

Roger: See that gal across the room ?

Harvey: Yes, she takes my breath away.

Roger: You got that right. She will take your breath away. I hired her to peel wallpaper in my bathroom with it.

by cut the cards February 23, 2023

mop up

To have to rewipe one's ass a few hours after a shit.

Mike: I need to go mop up it's so hot in this warehouse riding this forklift around.

Boss: Make it fast, we don't have all day.

by cut the cards August 8, 2022

jiffy pop

Ilhan Omars turban

Abdul: I see they took Ilhan Omar off the Foreign Affairs Committee.

Bill: Yes, poor jiffy pop head.

by cut the cards March 26, 2023

landing pad

Bald spot

Jill: There's a Chinese balloon headed our way.

Joe: No worries, I will go down on the beach and flash the landing pad for it to land on.

Jill: Good idea. Maybe it is dropping off our cash too.

by cut the cards February 5, 2023

anhowsyerbush

Asking a girl how their beer is.

Harvey: You drinking a Budweiser ?
Mabel: Why yes.
Harvey: Anhowsyerbush ?

Mabel: Oh, just fine.

Harvey: Sounds good to me.

by cut the cards January 25, 2023

hat in the ring

Get in on a huge blowout family argument

Roger: Boy, that sure was uncomfortable at the holiday gathering yesterday.

Harvey: Not sure what you mean ?

Roger: Lots of conversations and perceived slights henceforth to cry and whine about.

Harvey: Sorry, I had to take a leak every time I heard one start, or get more food.

Roger: Good move. You don't have to throw your hat in the ring then.
Harvey: I block numbers after these get together's for a while. It's great.

by cut the cards March 12, 2023