brett burkhardt's definitions
Someone who uses a speaker phone to feel like they’re important or doing some sort of important business even thought it’s for something stupid.
Mike hated talking to speaker phony customers. He couldn’t hear half the shit they said and, because they were only ordering pizza, he thought they could just pick up the phone instead of trying to shout at it from half way across the room.
“That guy was such a speaker phony. He called in to talk about his late fee and was 'too busy' to use the regular phone because he was playing x-box 360.”
“That guy was such a speaker phony. He called in to talk about his late fee and was 'too busy' to use the regular phone because he was playing x-box 360.”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Speaker Phony mug.Kara has a purse pooch that she dresses up in tiny feather boas and tiaras.
“If that purse pooch yips one more damn time I swear to Jesus I’m going to use it to beat her owner to death.”
“If that purse pooch yips one more damn time I swear to Jesus I’m going to use it to beat her owner to death.”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Purse Pooch mug.Usually used when fighting or about to fight, in this case it is used when hanging up on a rude or abusive caller. Can be used as a passive aggressive weapon if calls are being monitored or if a manager is nearby and you don't want them to hear you rip said caller a new asshole
If this bitch raises her voice to me again, I'll release the beast and hang up on her ass.
"So then I told her that we don't allow non-service dogs in this hotel and she flipped out on me, calling me a cunt and all this other shit."
"What did you do?"
"I released the beast. I wasn't going to stand there listing to someone scream at me over shit I don't control."
"So then I told her that we don't allow non-service dogs in this hotel and she flipped out on me, calling me a cunt and all this other shit."
"What did you do?"
"I released the beast. I wasn't going to stand there listing to someone scream at me over shit I don't control."
by Brett Burkhardt May 12, 2008
Get the Release the Beast mug.“...and then we were all at the bar, and Misty looked hot in that dress and everyone was looking at her. Then Laura blew a guy in the men’s room but, oh my god, this guy bought us all shots and then..”
“Wait, so Laura cheated on her boyfriend.”
“Oops, I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone” mumbled the Ratty Cathy.
No one ever told Clayton anything because he turned into a ratty Cathy after just one drink.
“Wait, so Laura cheated on her boyfriend.”
“Oops, I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone” mumbled the Ratty Cathy.
No one ever told Clayton anything because he turned into a ratty Cathy after just one drink.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Ratty Cathy mug.“Dude, you gonna help me move up that couch we found out by the dumpster?”
“Nah, that looks like it’s a scabies sanctuary.”
Tara thought that sweet almost chair from the second hand store was a steal. Too bad for her, it was a scabies sanctuary.
“Nah, that looks like it’s a scabies sanctuary.”
Tara thought that sweet almost chair from the second hand store was a steal. Too bad for her, it was a scabies sanctuary.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Scabies Sanctuary mug.Girls who go to GGW parties trying to get their tits on video so that they can brag about it or hoping that it will launch their career.
Ebony just knew that if she could get on the next GGW tape that record labels would be dying to sign her, everyone knew she was a Girls Gone Wild Wench.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Girls Gone Wild Wench mug.The congressman was committing suicide by slut when he took those tranny hookers to the pay by the hour motel just three blocks down from the local tv station.
When Greg told us he doesn’t use condoms with the skanks he brings home from the bar we all knew he was committing suicide by slut.
When Greg told us he doesn’t use condoms with the skanks he brings home from the bar we all knew he was committing suicide by slut.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Suicide by Slut mug.