Zonal K's definitions

Pole pumping

Male masturbation.

Mark's mum walked into his room and caught him pole pumping. She was initially horrified, but then started to enjoy the porn on the TV.

by Zonal K September 26, 2019

Political shatire

The act of accidentally defecating on stage while you are making jokes about politicians.

Marcus the comedian's opening act ended up being an anal opening act, after he slipped into full-on Political Shatire following a night of reheated curries.

by Zonal K August 24, 2019

pump partner

Someone you have sex with.

Rachel is my latest pump partner. I thrashed her gash last night actually.

by Zonal K October 2, 2019

no-blow zone

The area around a man's genetalia which is unable to be accessed for fellatio due to a foul-smelling fart discharge which may have been released accidentally or deliberately.

Linda's knob gobbling was clumsy and uncomfortable at best. It was time for me to create a no-blow zone and get out of there.

by Zonal K October 9, 2019

Arse-Pumped

The heavily worn-out state of a female's genetalia or anus following an intensive love-making thrashing.

Yeah it was a great night, Kelly's tuna canoe looked arse-pumped by the time I dropped her home.

by Zonal K June 23, 2018

Cum column

A penis.

I'm expecting some action tonight, so I washed my cum column.

by Zonal K September 21, 2019

Arse batter

The thick substance that is expelled from the anus.

Her knickers were full of arse batter..

by Zonal K June 25, 2018