A girl named Jessica. She's a dog with three heads. The other two heads of her disgusting trio vary from day to day, depending on who upsets us. She eats the runts of the library, and is never late. You can hear her from a mile away, by her hoofs galloping towards the victim spot. She is ungodly. Her hair is like salty seaweed, and her face is like a pig.
"wwooof woooofff my name is CERBERUS, and I hate bono. I am very opinionated, even when nobody asks. I am very conservative, and I hate homosexuals and abortion. Global warming doesn't exist.Sam, you're like number 3 on the runt list. Watch out man."