Third World Sam's definitions
To beat the French in terms of some of their undeniable national traits such as irreverence, disparagement, and belittlement, which every Frenchman or Frenchwoman will eventually display in their words and actions.
You should be smart ahead of time and call out these snail-eating motherfuckers for their supercilious behavior. Do not be polite or civil to them. Treat them just like they would treat you: like absolute dirt.
Anyone who has ever been belittled by a condescending French jerk knows exactly what I mean. Don't let it get to you. Stand your ground. This behavior is second nature to French people, just like breathing. Give them a taste of their own medicine.
However, rather than using words, you need to display your contempt for the French through visible actions. You will "outfrench" the French when you can beat them in their own national pastime of condescending power plays
Outfrench the douchebags from other countries only if they deserve it. With the French, it's game on no matter where in the world you run into these Gallic deceivers.
You should be smart ahead of time and call out these snail-eating motherfuckers for their supercilious behavior. Do not be polite or civil to them. Treat them just like they would treat you: like absolute dirt.
Anyone who has ever been belittled by a condescending French jerk knows exactly what I mean. Don't let it get to you. Stand your ground. This behavior is second nature to French people, just like breathing. Give them a taste of their own medicine.
However, rather than using words, you need to display your contempt for the French through visible actions. You will "outfrench" the French when you can beat them in their own national pastime of condescending power plays
Outfrench the douchebags from other countries only if they deserve it. With the French, it's game on no matter where in the world you run into these Gallic deceivers.
(At a tourist resort)
Me: "So, where you're from?"
Dude: "France!"
Me: (falls silent and leaves immediately)
Dude: "What happened?"
Passerby: "Well, mon lapin (my rabbit). You just got outfrenched by someone who knows talking to you people is a waste of time for him."
Me: "So, where you're from?"
Dude: "France!"
Me: (falls silent and leaves immediately)
Dude: "What happened?"
Passerby: "Well, mon lapin (my rabbit). You just got outfrenched by someone who knows talking to you people is a waste of time for him."
by Third World Sam December 1, 2024
Get the outfrenchmug. A man who sees nothing wrong in sleeping with multiple women simultaneously, concealing one from the others without a hint of guilt. The term ‘multi’ suggests the progression from being a two-timer to engaging in more complex forms of infidelity. Women can't be multi-timers by nature of their gender that requires more fidelity: it's easier to call them "sluts" and move on.
Multi-timers are more akin to "manwhores" but slightly more honorable, as the latter are only into infidelity because they're lowlifes. Multi-timers just need more time to settle in their lives, so are looking for more choices in women. It's like when you browse the shelves of a supermarket, you don't really buy everything you see.
Multi-timers are more akin to "manwhores" but slightly more honorable, as the latter are only into infidelity because they're lowlifes. Multi-timers just need more time to settle in their lives, so are looking for more choices in women. It's like when you browse the shelves of a supermarket, you don't really buy everything you see.
Randy is seeing Paula while making out with Molly, who's been sworn to secrecy about Paula. Molly readily obeys due to her own lack of moral compass. Randy also recently went to Las Vegas, indulging in threesomes with prostitutes. He's currently texting one for future encounters, all unbeknownst to Paula or Molly. Needless to say, neither of Randy's regular girls has a clue about his Vegas exploits.
Randy recently met an exchange student from the Czech Republic. They seemed to connect well, even making out at his office! Now smitten, Randy is planning a European vacation, possibly with Paula. While she enjoys Paris, Randy might travel to the Czech Republic to propose to his new girlfriend. This could lead him to unceremoniously drop his past girlfriends.
Basically, Randy is a multi timer.
Randy recently met an exchange student from the Czech Republic. They seemed to connect well, even making out at his office! Now smitten, Randy is planning a European vacation, possibly with Paula. While she enjoys Paris, Randy might travel to the Czech Republic to propose to his new girlfriend. This could lead him to unceremoniously drop his past girlfriends.
Basically, Randy is a multi timer.
by Third World Sam June 9, 2024
Get the Multi timermug. A continent-sized landmass south of the equator, pretty far from anywhere actual human beings live. It's where Mother Earth expels its excrement as this landfill is located literally on its arse bottom. Filled with kangaroos, koalas, dingoes, poisonous snakes, and nothing much of importance.
Also known as Van Diemen's Land.
INCORRECT SPELLING: Australia
CORRECT SPELLING: Arsetralia
Also known as Van Diemen's Land.
INCORRECT SPELLING: Australia
CORRECT SPELLING: Arsetralia
by Third World Sam April 10, 2022
Get the arsetraliamug. A unit of time used in Arsetralia and New Zealand, the complete opposite of a New York minute. In terms of normal Northern Hemisphere time units, it's equal to anywhere between 5 to 17 minutes. Approximately the time you need to take a comfortable dump in the toilet.
ORIGIN: The hours, minutes, and seconds move very slowly in Aussie-land and Kiwi-land compared to most of the Northern Hemisphere where actual human beings live. Aussies have nothing else to do than go surfing, drinking all day, and taking a nap in the afternoon (yet they are paid so handsomely well compared to hard-working people in most other countries who struggle for bare necessities). Following the Aussie Rules of time undoubtedly makes them one of the laziest people in the world.
The same unit can be used in the Northern Hemisphere to convey the need for a break or timeout.
You cannot hold an Aussie or New Zealander to the same standards of punctuality as everyone else (they're basically the same country; don't fall for their pretend bullshit that they are different people). Hence, the need for a standard of time that can be used for informal communication with these people (even formal communication).
ORIGIN: The hours, minutes, and seconds move very slowly in Aussie-land and Kiwi-land compared to most of the Northern Hemisphere where actual human beings live. Aussies have nothing else to do than go surfing, drinking all day, and taking a nap in the afternoon (yet they are paid so handsomely well compared to hard-working people in most other countries who struggle for bare necessities). Following the Aussie Rules of time undoubtedly makes them one of the laziest people in the world.
The same unit can be used in the Northern Hemisphere to convey the need for a break or timeout.
You cannot hold an Aussie or New Zealander to the same standards of punctuality as everyone else (they're basically the same country; don't fall for their pretend bullshit that they are different people). Hence, the need for a standard of time that can be used for informal communication with these people (even formal communication).
1. Aussie co-worker: "G'day mate. I'm taking a Sickie (sick leave). Wanna hang out and get wasted?"
You: "Sorry, mate. I have to work hard so I don't get fired. I want to be able to afford my rent so I don't have to go live on the streets again."
Aussie coworker: "Crikey! Just bring over your lappy (laptop) with ya. Tell your boss you're going off to meet clients or something."
You: "Listen, you lazy Aussie Drongo! I don't have an Australian minute to spare right now. So rack off and let me concentrate."
2. Somewhere in the Northern Hemisphere
Friend: "Buddy boy, come out right now. We're gonna go out pick some chicks at the bar."
You: "I'm gonna be right there. Just give me an Australian minute, ok? I'm taking a shower."
Friend: "What the hell is an Australian minute?"
You: "It's a unit of time. You'll soon find out. Just keep watching YouTube videos on your phone."
(35 minutes later)
Friend: "I watched an entire Netflix episode of Bridgerton. Is that an Australian minute?"
You: "No, that would be TWO Australian minutes. I'm so sorry for being an Australian minute late."
3.
You: "Sorry, mate. I have to work hard so I don't get fired. I want to be able to afford my rent so I don't have to go live on the streets again."
Aussie coworker: "Crikey! Just bring over your lappy (laptop) with ya. Tell your boss you're going off to meet clients or something."
You: "Listen, you lazy Aussie Drongo! I don't have an Australian minute to spare right now. So rack off and let me concentrate."
2. Somewhere in the Northern Hemisphere
Friend: "Buddy boy, come out right now. We're gonna go out pick some chicks at the bar."
You: "I'm gonna be right there. Just give me an Australian minute, ok? I'm taking a shower."
Friend: "What the hell is an Australian minute?"
You: "It's a unit of time. You'll soon find out. Just keep watching YouTube videos on your phone."
(35 minutes later)
Friend: "I watched an entire Netflix episode of Bridgerton. Is that an Australian minute?"
You: "No, that would be TWO Australian minutes. I'm so sorry for being an Australian minute late."
3.
by Third World Sam April 22, 2022
Get the australian minutemug. A mediocre, unimaginative person who can't write their way out of a wet paper bag. The medical condition is called Dysgraphia. If you've ever worked at advertising agencies, academic institutions or content marketing teams, you'd know who these people are. Non-writers are easily identified by their linear patterns of thinking, a complete inability to vary syntax, and an endless self-struggle with using the right adjective. They may apply all the cosmetic glow to their substandard, pathetic excuse of a writing but just one glance at those run-on sentences, and you'd know these people are just not meant to write anything important or complex.
By some quirk of fate, talented professional writers end up in the same team as these non-writers. In the eyes of management, they are the same as you, and are qualified to the same rates of pay. When that happens, you have no choice but to suffer their severe incompetence and bruised egos. Despite being embarrassing failures, non-writers are not open to constructive comments and edits.
The invention of AI writing tools has come as a boon to these non-writers. At least now they can hide their dysgraphia. But the lack of freshness in writing remains a permanent question mark on their skills and capabilities.
By some quirk of fate, talented professional writers end up in the same team as these non-writers. In the eyes of management, they are the same as you, and are qualified to the same rates of pay. When that happens, you have no choice but to suffer their severe incompetence and bruised egos. Despite being embarrassing failures, non-writers are not open to constructive comments and edits.
The invention of AI writing tools has come as a boon to these non-writers. At least now they can hide their dysgraphia. But the lack of freshness in writing remains a permanent question mark on their skills and capabilities.
Me: "Who wrote this blog post?"
Management: "Our new hire, Tanveer."
Me: "I'm sorry. Have you seen the adverb overload on this one? This looks like the work of a non-writer. This Tanveer or whatever should look for an alternative occupation. I can't think of a less capable person to be writing our blog posts."
Management: "Perhaps you're right. But you need to find a way to adjust around this non-writer. Why don't you just correct his mistakes, and no-one has to know! That's why we hired you anyway."
Management: "Our new hire, Tanveer."
Me: "I'm sorry. Have you seen the adverb overload on this one? This looks like the work of a non-writer. This Tanveer or whatever should look for an alternative occupation. I can't think of a less capable person to be writing our blog posts."
Management: "Perhaps you're right. But you need to find a way to adjust around this non-writer. Why don't you just correct his mistakes, and no-one has to know! That's why we hired you anyway."
by Third World Sam March 13, 2024
Get the non-writermug. An Islamic nation in the north of Europe, formerly known as the United Kingdom (UK). It's the most radicalized Muslim nation on the face of earth with Shariah Law replacing the Magna Carta, hijabi terroristas on every street corner, and pubs and churches converted to mosques blasting their ear deafening Allahu Akbar noise 24 hours a day.
Friend: "I'm booking the flight tickets for our vacation. Do you want to take a look at this?"
Me: "Sure what you've got?"
Friend: "Expedia says that if we transit through London Heathrow airport, we'll get a $50 discount per ticket. We'd just have a layover for 15 hours, tops. Sounds like a great deal but I'm not very sure. Something doesn't feel right."
Me: "Of course it shouldn't feel right to any right-thinking person. Never underestimate your gut feeling. What we've got here is an option that requires us to spend 15 hours in the United Khaliphate. EACH WAY. You don't want to fly through an airport guarded by Muslim terrorists everywhere. Imagine all those gun toting Jihadis masquerading as police officers. To hell with the $50 discount. Just forget about it. Find an alternate route that goes through Poland, maybe."
The UK was a once proud Christian nation and a major world power that invented the English language, instituted the Magna Carta, brought the Industrial Revolution, advanced scientific progress in every goddamned field, and defeated Nazi Germany in the second world war. The United Khaliphate on the other hand, is a parody and sick joke of a nation. Most of the Khaliphate's indigenous population has emigrated to foreign shores, especially Spain, Greece, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada, and some in Thailand. The current inhabitants of this land look as glum and miserable as you'd find in a Muslim country such as Pakistan, Egypt, or Iraq.
Me: "Sure what you've got?"
Friend: "Expedia says that if we transit through London Heathrow airport, we'll get a $50 discount per ticket. We'd just have a layover for 15 hours, tops. Sounds like a great deal but I'm not very sure. Something doesn't feel right."
Me: "Of course it shouldn't feel right to any right-thinking person. Never underestimate your gut feeling. What we've got here is an option that requires us to spend 15 hours in the United Khaliphate. EACH WAY. You don't want to fly through an airport guarded by Muslim terrorists everywhere. Imagine all those gun toting Jihadis masquerading as police officers. To hell with the $50 discount. Just forget about it. Find an alternate route that goes through Poland, maybe."
The UK was a once proud Christian nation and a major world power that invented the English language, instituted the Magna Carta, brought the Industrial Revolution, advanced scientific progress in every goddamned field, and defeated Nazi Germany in the second world war. The United Khaliphate on the other hand, is a parody and sick joke of a nation. Most of the Khaliphate's indigenous population has emigrated to foreign shores, especially Spain, Greece, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada, and some in Thailand. The current inhabitants of this land look as glum and miserable as you'd find in a Muslim country such as Pakistan, Egypt, or Iraq.
by Third World Sam November 13, 2023
Get the united khaliphatemug. Someone from the continent of Europe, often found in the cheapest hostels, dormitories and capsule hotels around the world. As long as this disease is contained within Europe, I don't have a problem with them. But these days the Euroscum choose to infect desirable vacation spots in Asia such as Macau, Goa, Phuket, Jeju Island, or Bali, bringing their cheap sunglasses and smelly suntan lotions everywhere. While the hostel owners and guided tour operators love them, Euroscum are universally despised by wealthy Asians, and even not-so-wealthy Asians.
The Euroscum are the reason you choose to book a fairly expensive hotel so that you don't run into them to exchange those awkward hellos and "Wanna smoke?" sessions. Every single one of them is a nicotine addict chuffing smoke with tar deliberately to shorten other people's lives. They like to extensively talk about politics, cheap hostels, ridesharing deals, and anything that involves spending less money because they're such total cheapskates.
The easiest way to ditch a Euroscum is to make them a suggestion that involves spending money: "Hey, looks like we both have nothing much to do. Let's go shopping at the local mall. I need to buy new clothes and you must upgrade those cheap sunglasses. No one likes them here. This isn't Europe, my friend." Or just tell them that you're allergic to smoking. If you're a non-alcoholic, that should work in your favor.
The Euroscum are the reason you choose to book a fairly expensive hotel so that you don't run into them to exchange those awkward hellos and "Wanna smoke?" sessions. Every single one of them is a nicotine addict chuffing smoke with tar deliberately to shorten other people's lives. They like to extensively talk about politics, cheap hostels, ridesharing deals, and anything that involves spending less money because they're such total cheapskates.
The easiest way to ditch a Euroscum is to make them a suggestion that involves spending money: "Hey, looks like we both have nothing much to do. Let's go shopping at the local mall. I need to buy new clothes and you must upgrade those cheap sunglasses. No one likes them here. This isn't Europe, my friend." Or just tell them that you're allergic to smoking. If you're a non-alcoholic, that should work in your favor.
Friend: "Hey, looks like the hotels in Macau are going to be very expensive for those dates. Do you think we should book a dormitory with shared bathroom? That would be a lot cheaper."
Me: "Noooooooo.....we'll be surrounded by those poverty-stricken Euroscum roommates. I'm travelling to the Macau Casinos for good luck, and I don't want those cheapskates ruining any good vibes we'll have. If you can't find a decent hotel in Macau, try looking for a Hyatt or Marriott in Zhuhai, China. Not very far really. We can hire a daily cab."
Friend: "Yea....anything to keep our distance from the Euroscum."
Me: "So where you're from?"
Euroscum: "I don't really know where I belong. I mean I was born in Belgium, but I have a German citizenship, but I currently live in Spain. I mean I used to live in Spain for twenty years till it got too expensive, so I recently shifted to Romania. And isn't it sweet, right now we're all here in Asia. My long-separated parents are from Czech Republic and Sweden. Do you have a cigarette lighter?"
Me: "Oh you're a Euroscum all right. And no, I don't smoke cigarettes.
Me: "Noooooooo.....we'll be surrounded by those poverty-stricken Euroscum roommates. I'm travelling to the Macau Casinos for good luck, and I don't want those cheapskates ruining any good vibes we'll have. If you can't find a decent hotel in Macau, try looking for a Hyatt or Marriott in Zhuhai, China. Not very far really. We can hire a daily cab."
Friend: "Yea....anything to keep our distance from the Euroscum."
Me: "So where you're from?"
Euroscum: "I don't really know where I belong. I mean I was born in Belgium, but I have a German citizenship, but I currently live in Spain. I mean I used to live in Spain for twenty years till it got too expensive, so I recently shifted to Romania. And isn't it sweet, right now we're all here in Asia. My long-separated parents are from Czech Republic and Sweden. Do you have a cigarette lighter?"
Me: "Oh you're a Euroscum all right. And no, I don't smoke cigarettes.
by Third World Sam November 1, 2023
Get the Euroscummug.