3 definitions by The Skitter Man

Jarming

The art of jarming is a skill only acquired by compulsive liars (Jarmies), even though you can tell that they are lying they still proceed to jarm.

Father: Did you step in ding dang didly doo?

Jarmy: Naw

Father: I can clearly see the dog water on the bottom of your shoe.

Jarmy: No there isn't that's muck

Jarmy*Jarming, knowing well and truly that he stood in dog shit*

by The Skitter Man December 27, 2019

Gulpin

A noun used to describe somebody who is as ignorant as they come. Usually big operators (and by that I mean heavy men), gulpins do not have "please" and "thank you" in their vocabulary. A gulpin does not wait in line. For example, they won't queue for a toilet but instead take a shite in the centre of the floor where they stand. Gulpins only come home from work for one thing and one thing only... The dinner, only to then beach up on the sofa and tell the wife to move out of the road of the TV.

Often associated with ignorance.

*At a food deli*

*Gulpin pushes into the queue*

Gulpin: "Give me a load of chips, stuffin', gravy and 4 sausages on top of that there."

Worker: "Is that everything for you sir?"

Gulpin: "Naw, give us a portion of chicken bites there as well, for I've been walking all day and couldn't go a meal without it."

*Gulpin pays for food and walks out*

Worker to themself: "Thon Dunc boy is some gulpin."

by The Skitter Man December 24, 2021

Skitter

A substance that seens to be on the walls of every fucking public toilet I go into.

Ethan: "Don't go into thon toilet, she's a

bad job."

Daniel: "Sure it can't be that bad."

*Daniel enters toilet *

Daniel: *Gags* "Oh Jaysus, there's skitter

every road."

by The Skitter Man December 16, 2018